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Old 10-21-2016, 10:49 PM   #31
KCQuestor
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I swear I ignore more people on the comedy threads than in any other forum on the site.
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Old 11-01-2016, 09:10 PM   #32
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SOULMANIKE View Post

A modern day cowboy had spent many days crossing the Dakota prairies without water.
His horse had already died of thirst.

He's crawling along the dusty ground, certain that he has breathed his last breath, when all of a sudden he sees an object sticking out of the ground several yards ahead of him. He crawls to the object, pulls it out of the ground and discovers what looks to be an old briefcase.

He opens it and out pops a genie. But this is no ordinary genie. She is wearing an IRS ID badge and a dull grey dress. There's a calculator in her pocketbook. She has a pencil tucked behind one ear.

'Well, cowboy,' says the genie, 'You know how this works... You have three wishes.'

'I'm not falling for this,' says the cowboy, 'I'm not going to trust an IRS genie.'

'What do you have to lose? You've got no transportation, and it looks like you're a goner anyway!'

The cowboy thinks about this for a minute and decides that the genie is right.

'OK! I wish I were along-side a lush spring with plenty of food and drink.'

***POOF*** The cowboy finds himself beside the most beautiful spring he has ever seen, and he's surrounded with jugs of wine and platters of delicacies.

'OK, cowpoke, what's your second wish.'

'My second wish is that I was rich ....beyond my wildest dreams.'

***POOF***The cowboy finds himself surrounded by treasure chests filled with rare gold coins and precious gems.

'OK, cowpuncher, you have just one more wish. Better make it a good one!'

After thinking for a few minutes, the cowboy says, 'I wish that no matter where I go, beautiful women will want and need me.'

***POOF*** He's turned into a tampon.

The moral of the story:

If the U.S. government offers to help you, there's going to be a string attached.
You need to send this to Hilary Clinton, just don't E-mail it, send it conventional, lol.


Jim
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Old 11-06-2016, 03:10 PM   #33
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... with all the undercover without a brain taking order from criminal it might get intercepted at the post office
... btw how does cjohnny54 username post # hahahahehehehohoho represent giving it all away unless someone on some kind of DRUG (delusional thinking) LMAO
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Old 11-11-2016, 09:53 PM   #34
STANDAR
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so true
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Old 11-12-2016, 08:32 AM   #35
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Old 03-06-2017, 07:21 PM   #36
UofHpc
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SOULMANIKE View Post

A modern day cowboy had spent many days crossing the Dakota prairies without water.
His horse had already died of thirst.

He's crawling along the dusty ground, certain that he has breathed his last breath, when all of a sudden he sees an object sticking out of the ground several yards ahead of him. He crawls to the object, pulls it out of the ground and discovers what looks to be an old briefcase.

He opens it and out pops a genie. But this is no ordinary genie. She is wearing an IRS ID badge and a dull grey dress. There's a calculator in her pocketbook. She has a pencil tucked behind one ear.

'Well, cowboy,' says the genie, 'You know how this works... You have three wishes.'

'I'm not falling for this,' says the cowboy, 'I'm not going to trust an IRS genie.'

'What do you have to lose? You've got no transportation, and it looks like you're a goner anyway!'

The cowboy thinks about this for a minute and decides that the genie is right.

'OK! I wish I were along-side a lush spring with plenty of food and drink.'

***POOF*** The cowboy finds himself beside the most beautiful spring he has ever seen, and he's surrounded with jugs of wine and platters of delicacies.

'OK, cowpoke, what's your second wish.'

'My second wish is that I was rich ....beyond my wildest dreams.'

***POOF***The cowboy finds himself surrounded by treasure chests filled with rare gold coins and precious gems.

'OK, cowpuncher, you have just one more wish. Better make it a good one!'

After thinking for a few minutes, the cowboy says, 'I wish that no matter where I go, beautiful women will want and need me.'

***POOF*** He's turned into a tampon.

The moral of the story:

If the U.S. government offers to help you, there's going to be a string attached.
It so rig, from what I read on the other site ... the top level L.E. have alway been spying on his(cjohnny54, cjohn, etc) family from the first day he came to the U.S.
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Old 03-07-2017, 07:40 AM   #37
lickidyclit
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Quote:
Originally Posted by austin_voy View Post
I'd always heard that as being a black man. "I wish I was white and surrounded by pussy." Same result.
I like that sceniaro better,lol
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Old 03-07-2017, 04:55 PM   #38
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has anyone seen the accountant ... is that where the term TRAILER TRASH (does not refer to a single race or class of people) come from ... LOL
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