Does it alter your perception of a provider...

[Hot to Trot Daphne]

When you know that a provider also provides domme/fetish services? I resemble that description and sometimes have guys either tell me that they are intimidated by this or ask half jokingly after they make an appointment "you're not going to try to stick anything in my ass are you?". The answer to that is of course not, unless that's what floats your boat. If a gentleman contacts me for a session and does not indicate that a BDSM session is what he's coming for I won't introduce any aspect of it unless he asks.

FTR, strap on play is only one of the many aspects of BDSM, but that is for another thread. For all intent and purposes for this this thread, here is a rough description of terms for those that may not be familiar. Links: What is BDSM? What are fetishes?

Some providers, as most people are in general, are multifaceted. I have the sweet, soft, and romantic side to me, and then there is my extra kinky twin. At times, I can be both. Catering to all sides of our sexuality is what I enjoy most about this hobby of ours.

So back to my original question: Does knowing a provider's other sexual interests that may be considered outside of the realm of vanilla have a bearing on how you perceive they will be BCD?

To go a step further, if you are a kinky or sub looking for a true Domme, does the fact that she may also provide vanilla services not make you take her as seriously?

[Guest110416]

It would depend on if that is all that she wants to provide in a session, then I would definitely not see her when wanting a GFE session that does not involve BDSM.

As we all know, providing is about role play since most providers would not want to have anything to do with most of the guys that hobby unless they were getting paid, so if you know how to be multifaceted when the role calls for it and by getting what the hobbyist wants out of a session beforehand, and you can/will do that as long as it is within your comfortable limits, then you should be fine.

[Sir Lancehernot]

The answer to your question is yes.

When it comes to "other sexual interests that may be considered outside of the realm of vanilla," there are two basic types of providers: specialists and accommodators. In your specific example, a specialist would be more interested in seeing clients who shared those interests than she would a client looking for a GFE or a quick nut. An accommodator would typically not have much interest in those other interests, but would provide services geared toward them upon the client's request.

You'll see lots of women mentioning "special interest" services in their P411 profiles, but it's pretty obvious from reviews and additional text in ads who's serious about that stuff and who'll do it just because the client is into it.

I wouldn't engage someone who appears to have a strong interest in those areas. I really can't explain it. I'm not afraid of anything bad happening. It just seems like it's a barrier of some kind, erected between our worlds, that it would be difficult for me to cross.

I feel pretty much the same way about ladies who list "gangbangs" in their activities. I like GFE/IOP sessions, and the IOP is pretty much shattered when I think of the woman I'm having sex with having a dick in each hole, one in each hand, and three guys waiting their turns.

Now, on those rare occasions when all I want is a quick nut, merely sexual service and relief, I wouldn't have any problems calling upon such a lady. But I would consult with her in an entirely different manner than I would my GFE friends.

[Tiffani Jameson]

Originally Posted by Sir Lancehernot

The answer to your question is yes.

When it comes to "other sexual interests that may be considered outside of the realm of vanilla," there are two basic types of providers: specialists and accommodators. In your specific example, a specialist would be more interested in seeing clients who shared those interests than she would a client looking for a GFE or a quick nut. An accommodator would typically not have much interest in those other interests, but would provide services geared toward them upon the client's request.

You'll see lots of women mentioning "special interest" services in their P411 profiles, but it's pretty obvious from reviews and additional text in ads who's serious about that stuff and who'll do it just because the client is into it.

I wouldn't engage someone who appears to have a strong interest in those areas. I really can't explain it. I'm not afraid of anything bad happening. It just seems like it's a barrier of some kind, erected between our worlds, that it would be difficult for me to cross.

I feel pretty much the same way about ladies who list "gangbangs" in their activities. I like GFE/IOP sessions, and the IOP is pretty much shattered when I think of the woman I'm having sex with having a dick in each hole, one in each hand, and three guys waiting their turns.

Now, on those rare occasions when all I want is a quick nut, merely sexual service and relief, I wouldn't have any problems calling upon such a lady. But I would consult with her in an entirely different manner than I would my GFE friends.

Sooo you're saying there's no middle ground?

Maybe it's because I'm a Gemini, but I feel safe in saying that MOST people, women notwithstanding, are ever one way or another. We're multifaceted, are turned on by a range of things, and different men bring out different things in us.

Your statement says a lot about you as a person. But as sure as there are people like you in the world, there are men who are.... not like you.

Remember: variety is the spice of life, Sir Lancehernot. And that wasn't meant just for the boys.

[Sir Lancehernot]

The OP asked a question. I provided her with an answer, based on my knowledge, perceptions, and opinions. Don't like it? Pick up your cellphone and call someone who cares.

[motor]

I am pretty sure I would be ok with it. I mean, ok, lets say you and your SO for the most part have "standard vanilla sex" and every once in a while she dress up in a maid or nurse, cheerleader outfit.
Or if you and her talked dirty to each other. I am kind of thinking it would be along the same lines wouldn't it?

[Tiffani Jameson]

Originally Posted by Sir Lancehernot

The OP asked a question. I provided her with an answer, based on my knowledge, perceptions, and opinions. Don't like it? Pick up your cellphone and call someone who cares.

I'm sorry, I think there was a disconnect here. I was in no way bashing you. Just that there's good in variety. I thought that challenging your perception was a part of constructive dialogue.

But your hostility says more than your previous post. Good day to you.

[Eva Damita]

As I remember another provider saying, and with my own experience, ALL of my fetish and dominating affairs are never reviewed - it's not that I ask them to, I suppose they just don't feel comfortable sharing taboo fetishes, although a large majority of my experiences and affairs include some prostate play minamally.

[WW1flyingAce]

Not that Lance needs my help, but the OP ask for opinions and he gave his. He didn't claim to be speaking for all mankind, just saying what he believed.

Every time I think I'm about to read and intelligent conversation on here, someone derails it with personal vendetta or some other drama. The parts of this site I appreciate involve helping me to have a better hobby experience. And I'm not speaking for the human race either, just my personal view point.

[Tiffani Jameson]

Originally Posted by WW1flyingAce

Not that Lance needs my help, but the OP ask for opinions and he gave his. He didn't claim to be speaking for all mankind, just saying what he believed.

Every time I think I'm about to read and intelligent conversation on here, someone derails it with personal vendetta or some other drama. The parts of this site I appreciate involve helping me to have a better hobby experience. And I'm not speaking for the human race either, just my personal view point.

He doesn't need any help, because this isn't a fight. And it's Lance that attempted the drama, not me. I don't feel that I belittled him for his thought processes. All I noted is that he has a very traditional way of looking at things. I don't feel that's bad. I just challenged his notion that women can be more than just a Dom or GFE. If he feels it's bad enough to fight me over, that's not my problem.

I thought it was a very intelligent conversation, one where we all get to express our opinions, and challenge each other on THE SUBJECT. Isn't that the whole point of an intelligent conversation? It becomes a monologue if everyone was to agree. And a person engaging in a public conversation should not be beyond contestation.

[pyramider]

Whip me, spanck me ... LD gots some taint.

[Hot to Trot Daphne]

Now, now people. Surely we can have a conversation like adults.

I think that everyone can have a valid opinion, depending on their point of view. Those wishing to challenge or rebut those opinions also have that right. WALDT. This is a topic that I seriously wonder about, and this thread can grow some legs if given a chance. Let's be adults.

Enough about that..

Originally Posted by Sir Lancehernot

The answer to your question is yes.

When it comes to "other sexual interests that may be considered outside of the realm of vanilla," there are two basic types of providers: specialists and accommodators. In your specific example, a specialist would be more interested in seeing clients who shared those interests than she would a client looking for a GFE or a quick nut. An accommodator would typically not have much interest in those other interests, but would provide services geared toward them upon the client's request.

You'll see lots of women mentioning "special interest" services in their P411 profiles, but it's pretty obvious from reviews and additional text in ads who's serious about that stuff and who'll do it just because the client is into it.

I wouldn't engage someone who appears to have a strong interest in those areas. I really can't explain it. I'm not afraid of anything bad happening. It just seems like it's a barrier of some kind, erected between our worlds, that it would be difficult for me to cross.

thanks for posting. I would not like to think of myself as a specialist in either vanilla or bdsm, but I definitely know that I am not just an accommodator. The only thing that I could consider myself a specialist in is sex and trying new ways to get freaky. I began in the hobby as a bdsm provider, and did so for awhile before I decided to cast my net out further because I sometimes I needed something more than a D/s arrangement to make me feel like a complete sexual woman. So, I added a sweeter, softer persona (hard to believe this is it huh? LOL) to attract those flies with the honey. Financially I was ok with just providing bdsm, choosing to expand my services was done of emotional necessity, not just a private one.

Sex is so multifaceted that a gfe session can morph into a pse session, and from there can bleed into a bdsm session. Many of the guys who have come to see me has confided to craving an element in bdsm (whether it be a physical or mental one) that they would never and I mean never admit to in a review.

Like sweet Tiffani said in this thread, some providers are lucky enough though it may be rare, to enjoy both equally as much.

Originally Posted by Tiffani Jameson

Sooo you're saying there's no middle ground?

Maybe it's because I'm a Gemini, but I feel safe in saying that MOST people, women notwithstanding, are ever one way or another. We're multifaceted, are turned on by a range of things, and different men bring out different things in us.

Your statement says a lot about you as a person. But as sure as there are people like you in the world, there are men who are.... not like you.

Remember: variety is the spice of life, Sir Lancehernot. And that wasn't meant just for the boys.

^this. I'm a Pisces chica, so I can understand how one could "flip mode". It does not come easily though. Once Sheeda is out to play it's hard to put her back into her cage.

[universalenergy]

Whip me, spank me, call me Edna.

[Brot]

I prefer to explore my sexuality within the many doors i have opened up already. I tend to stay away from someone marketing something i have no proclivity for already.

Just like the Chinese spoon down the street. They may make a kick ass burger but i would never go there looking.

[Jake B]

What a provider chooses to do with another client is no business of mine. Of course I can read other's reviews to see what they have been up to...but sometimes part of the fantasy is not knowing. Ignorance is bliss, right?