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Caitie Mae · 04-14-2011, 11:27 PM

I was having a discussion with someone (who is not "active" in the hobby) about screening and references. To this person, it seems impossible to think that I am not the only ho in the world who would provide a reference for a hobbyist I've seen who wants to see a provider in another state while he's traveling and not charge him a single penny to do it.

I say that providing a reference as a courtesy is not only done regularly, but it is an industry standard these days. I also said that it's actually more of a courtesy to other providers than it is to the hobbyist because the exchange of personal references is one of the primary defenses that providers use to stay safely out of harm's way by weeding out LE, psychos, sickos, time wasters and other undesirables.

My friend still doesn't quite get that providing a reference is not a requirement endured by providers as much as it is one endured by hobbyists. My friend still can't believe that providers offer references free of charge.

Can someone back me up on this?

~sweetness~

FishGuy13 · 04-14-2011, 11:57 PM

Hmm, just tell him you'd be happy to charge him but (remind him as you said) it is really more of a service to the other providers or that is just how the Dallas / Ft Worth area works. Or perhaps you could say it is included in the package deal of your rates, after-all most providers say they don't sell sex, just time and that, that is all part of the fee. I am lucky to be in this metro area!

Guest021812-3 · 04-15-2011, 08:15 AM

Should hobbyists start charging for reviews?

Putanna Di Classe · 04-15-2011, 08:33 AM

Oh yes, in my experience it has always been the norm that ladies give out references. And of course for free. I wouldn't dream of charging...I do it to keep the other ladies safe and I would hope that's the reason all the other ladies do it. We gotta watch each others' backs! No one else really can in the hobby, so we have got to help each other.

I could see an outsider not understanding. This hobby world of ours is so intricate with subtle nuances and systems that run outside of the rest of RL society. It's kind of like when you are trying to explain something to a child and they just don't get it. It's not because they are not smart, but just because they have not experienced it yet.

Macgregor · 04-15-2011, 09:02 AM

It's known as a "Professional Courtesy" and it happens in every profession I can think of. Remember also that it can be exclusive as well as inclusive.

MacGregor

Randy4Candy · 04-15-2011, 09:46 AM

CM - huh?

LuckJack · 04-15-2011, 10:55 AM

A reference that had been paid for would have little value. CM's comment on provider safety seems to be the driver for the free exchange of information.

HoneyRose · 04-15-2011, 12:03 PM

Not only do most of us give references, some of us even give suggestions to clients of other ladies they may wish to see.

Guest062124 · 04-15-2011, 01:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HoneyRose

... some of us even give suggestions to clients of other ladies they may wish to see.

So true, and I am glad that I am getting to know a few more lovely ladies so that I can do the same thing. I have always believed that giving a reference was important to our safety, I have been shocked to learn that there are ladies who absolutely will not provide references. Charging for them? Never.

Guest032213 · 04-15-2011, 06:13 PM

SO out of control ! wow! NEVER charge for a refrence, thats what we have other sources to ck ppl out , men and women to be a fact! i would never charge for a refrence, wow! I have provided many refrences , and will so in the future. Lex

Kaci Snow · 04-15-2011, 06:46 PM

I cant believe this i had to read the OPs post a couple times. This is crazy. I will provide refrences if you call , text , email , pm how ever you get it to me. I dont however provide refrences after about 90days of seeing a gent. I do that for safety reasons in this day and age people can change so fast and i would hate to have something bad happen to somebody .

TheWanderer · 04-15-2011, 08:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LuckJack

A reference that had been paid for would have little value. CM's comment on provider safety seems to be the driver for the free exchange of information.

Very true. Consider the fact that if anyone starts charging for references then people could get hurt. A dangerous and opportunistic sexual predator probably would not mind paying a little more for the chance to be alone with someone. References should stay free and honest as a professional courtesy....mutual back scratching....pay it forward.

RichYoungbuck4u · 04-15-2011, 10:38 PM

I think it would be prudent and ok to give out 2 references per visitation. I think that if a client see's you one time he shouldn't be calling you or propositioning you on a weekly basis for 3 or more months. The "You scratch my itch and I'll scratch yours principle" should be more than enough. But charging outright for a reference I think is wrong.

notdeadyet · 04-16-2011, 09:00 AM

The act of giving references is simply enlightened self-interest by a provider because doing so allows her to receive references from others, and thus makes her job that much safer and easier. As someone above said, there is an enormous potential for abuse if payment for references was required.

bigdog0311 · 04-16-2011, 02:01 PM

There is not one female out there with whom you have sexual relations with, (not just one night stands) that the man/woman is not "paying her" in some form or fashion, and it is even worse in this hobby world, so the answer to OP's question is NO. The ladies here, while beautiful and maybe great BCD, will never do anything UNLESS something she has a "benefit" coming. It is a cruel world, and most people look out for #1.