The Anti-Fuck?

[Secret_Amore]

So...I sent out a couple of email holiday greetings to past dates most of them I receive warm happy holiday to you too type responses. except one. >_>

all I said in my initial message was
Staff Edit....Posting Private Communications is Forbidden....Spacemtn
No forms of private communications may be posted. You are a member and the guideline says that no form of private communication between member(s) may be posted.
how dare I send him a holiday greeting? geez I didn't know I crossed a line..... didn't know you thought the date was that bad either.

Ok the sandwich thing when I have dates around lunch time I make sandwiches either for before or after the sexy time. I mean for gods sake what guy doesn't enjoy food and sex??? I thought I was being a good host. Damn

ok and since when is saying happy holidays called solicitation??? o.O wtf I wasn't all like come see me again I just said hope you had a good christmas geez.

and threatening to report me to the police. god that's a bit extreme....I mean even if you didn't enjoy that date who does that?

and ok the very brief review/overview of our date described as the Anti-fuck? I was lifeless??? totally non-sensual??? um? I sorry I didn't know you were that unhappy...why didn't he indicate so during the date so I could have a chance to try and do better? T_T

I don't remeber much about the actual sexy time except even in my opinion it was just ok but I do remember that when I checked the donation afterwards he shortaged me, back then I thought he just didn't have enough or didn't know what my rate was. NOW in this new light I think it was because he was so dissatisfied and I'm surprised he gave me anything at all since he was so let down. :/

so after receiving this message now I feel bad and am plagued with self doubt. I hate the idea of someone being so UNhappy after they leave me especially since I really do try to make sure someone has a good time and this doesn't happen. But I am More hurt by his words and threat. Happy Holidays to me apparently you suck at sex.

even though I would totally cringe had this been a board review it really is hard not knowing if someone really enjoyed the date afterwards or is just too polite to my face to express why they were dissatisfied.

Does anyone else I've seen feel this way? or I mean like were you dissapointed and with what? So I know.

also anyone have and pointers on being more "sensual" I was NOT "Lifeless" tho > I don't care What his opinion was of the date I was NOT lifeless.

and is it really bad to make sandwiches for lunch dates? I mean i don't count the meal time towards the OTC time.

and seriously was I really that bad? T_T Should I be asking guys what they thought afterwards or for pointers or would that just be asking for trouble...


The Anti-Fuck...gee let me just go crawl back into my hole now.
I can't be that terrible if people have requested to see me again...

[Allied Forces]

OTC sandwich sounds like a winning situation to me
The Anti-Fuck? OMG that is hilarious, I wish I would have come up with that one!

[Squarenot]

Originally Posted by Allied Forces

The Anti-Fuck? OMG that is hilarious, I wish I would have come up with that one!

I agree, that is a hilarious phrase.

[bueller22]

Hi Secret. I think that that there is a segment of the population that are inconsiderate and mean/unhappy. It doesn't matter what kind of business you're in these people will be impossible to please. Don't let these kind of people upset you. You're a beautiful person inside and out. I can't imagine any circumstance where anyone could call you "lifeless"...unless you were maybe reacting to a negative vibe they brought into the session.

[Whispers]

What is inconsiderate here is you contacting a client without some expressed prior permission.

We all have a right to expect privacy and you are paid to go away when it is done and over with.

If we want to hear from you again we will either let you know that it is OK to contact us and how or we will contact you ourselves.

It is normally considered very poor etiquette and bad business to contact a guy on your own initiative.

You were unprofessional and inconsiderate...

But hey..... on the upside you found out what he thought of you......

[Guest021716-4]

You should write an ad called The Anti-Fuck & send him the link!!
Please, let me write it!!


Girl, don't let that shit get to you or you will be upset ALL the time. I used to have thin skin real bad. I am still sensitive, but not like I used to be. Give it another year providing... You will either get nice & jaded and give an anti-fuck or it will swallow you up. I am half way kidding.

There are some people you can send emails and some you can't. You just have to make sure the client is okay with it.
He may have felt like you were trying to get money out of him and being manipulative by sending him the email? I am not saying you were.

I am just saying maybe he could have taken it that way. Then again, there are some clients that get upset if you don't email them!! Ya can't win, sometimes.

Take it as a lesson and move on. I still say write the Anti-Fuck ad!!

[Sexecutioner]

Sexcuse me, we do kind of pay for discretion. But I do love sandwiches, before, during, and after Sexy Time. So if you're making 3 I'm in

[stikiwikit]

Would his real life name perhaps be "Ebenezer"?

[Guest062114-5]

I wouldn't give too much credence to the details if what he said. He was 99% wrong in being so nasty. But you were also wrong in contacting him. For any reason. It's a no no and you learned your lesson the hard way.

So, next time you're snacking on a yummy sandwich with a client after sexy time, simply ask if it's ok to drop him an occasional email or if that's a risky idea, privacy wise.

Even then, it's not a great idea. There are a million scenarios why this could go wrong.

Lesson learned. Don't make a big deal of it. Move on and stop the SPAM...unless its in a sandwich. Well, even then...

[GneissGuy]

Consider yourself lucky he showed his inner Mr. Hyde remotely, rather than face to face. Forget him and move on.

It is generally considered bad form to contact a guy later unless he's said it's OK.

In my opinion, e-mail and text is a definite no-no, unless you've got permission or know the guy won't mind. Too much chance of the wrong person seeing the message.

A PM on eccie is not quite as risky. Once someone has found his eccie account and gotten access, the secret is out. However, do be careful and don't say anything that adds to the risk if the wrong person gets access.

The eccie rules only prevent "spam" and harassment via PM.

You should still be careful with unsolicited PM's. Even here, it's probably not wise to send a canned greeting to a guy who's not a repeat client or a person you contact regularly.

Some guys may object to any unsolicited PM's at all.

Personally, feel free to PM me, especially if we've had some form of contact.

[Loxly]

Unsolicited emails can be a problem so unless you have prior "clearance" it's best not to do that. I get regular notes from past providers in Ohio and Baltimore but they're just that. Something to touch base with and no solicitations for business.

The Anti-Fuck?

Reminds me of a dream one of my hobby friends related to me. He had a dream that he found himself on a desert island. He found a washed up bottle which of course had a genie in it. Keep in mind that many genies have a twisted sense of humor.

So the Genie gave him two wishes.

First wish was for a never-ending cooler of beer. POOF... the bottomless igloo appeared.

Second wish was for a dozen hot and horny women. POOF... 12 of the greatest looking babes you'd ever want to screw showed up.

Figuring on starting off with a beer he popped the top off one of the bottles.

He: "Hey... what the hell? There's no hole in this bottle!"

Genie: "There's none in the Broads either!"

[Doglegg]

Unsolicited emails/PMs are a no-no in all cases?

Horse-hockey.

Cold call/solicitations I would agree these are no-nos.

A holiday/seasonal greeting to someone you have seen and enjoyed companionship? I don't consider this bad form, I see it as nice manners.

That this guy wigged out is not your fault. He could have just replied 'thank you and to you the same, but please do not contact me again.'

This is not you, this could be that the client is not a happy person, not a holiday person, not a nice person. Who knows.

This idea that providers should never initiate PMs or send emails to obvious hobby accounts to previous clients is hog wash unless the email is a request for cash or a direct solicitation. But that is only my opinion.

Have a happy New Year.

[Secret_Amore]

:/ It was only a seasonal greeting kind of like a touch base. we had multiple email exchanges prior to the date. it didn't seem to out there to just say merry christmas and happy new year >_> it's not like i said anything to implicate anything NOR did I ask for a visit OR imply I was hoping for one or anything it was a fucking holiday hello greeting. it was discrete I didn't text him on his phone, call him out the blue use naughty subtext. I mean geez I sent Claire and Lily holiday greeting via email as well. I was just wishing ppl Happy holidays. I wasn't spam or harassment.

it not even something I do a lot. heck I don't even call/text guys back if it's been and hour since I missed their call 'cause everyone's up uptight about not getting contacted by providers

[Whispers]

Originally Posted by Secret_Amore

:/ It was only a seasonal greeting kind of like a touch base. we had multiple email exchanges prior to the date. it didn't seem to out there to just say merry christmas and happy new year >_> it's not like i said anything to implicate anything NOR did I ask for a visit OR imply I was hoping for one or anything it was a fucking holiday hello greeting. it was discrete I didn't text him on his phone, call him out the blue use naughty subtext. I mean geez I sent Claire and Lily holiday greeting via email as well. I was just wishing ppl Happy holidays. I wasn't spam or harassment.

it not even something I do a lot. heck I don't even call/text guys back if it's been and hour since I missed their call 'cause everyone's up uptight about not getting contacted by providers

Maybe it was a bad choice of words.....



Post the PM and let us critique it!

[GneissGuy]

Originally Posted by Doglegg

Unsolicited emails/PMs are a no-no in all cases?

Horse-hockey.

Unfortunately, not everyone sets up a separate secure hobby e-mail account. Or is smart enough to set up their computer/smart phone to not remember the password/account/etc. Or to always lock their computer when they're away from it.

I say unsolicited e-mail is a no-no unless you know it's OK for the guy.