Ghosting Issue

[AcetheJace]

This question is for both hobbyists and providers: How much ghosting do you experience? Does it upset you or do you just get used to it?

I don't know if it's because I'm a Type A personality or because of the mistrust on both sides because of past experiences, but I find it to be very frustrating and time wasting.

On the providers' end, I can see how we can come off as blunt or rude especially when texting or emailing can be easily misinterpreted, but I become less open to chatting with you when I get ghosted and you don't even grant me a few seconds of your time to me saying you can't make it. I believe I don't ask for much but I begin to feel like I did something wrong. As a provider, I do believe in providing a good service and experience.

On the hobbyists' end, I've heard the horror stories (ie, catfishing), and I'm sorry that there are a few bad apples that spoil it for the rest of the providers that are decent. Some hobbyists have stated they've experienced the same thing but turn right around and ghost me.

I just wanted to know since I don't do this often and I am a newbie.

[ritter]

It just goes with the industry underground.

[rustyshackleford112.7]

I am sure I have ghosted a provider or two in my time. Never once a time or location has been confirmed but I have been in the process of scheduling an appointment and went silent due to something popping up at work. I have been ghosted and ncns'd so I dont worry too much about it. Part of the business.

[tbone2u]

I don't believe I have ever ghosted anyone. I may have missed one or 2 appointments but I let them know at the last minute and paid for the time I missed the next time I saw them. It only takes a minute to let the other person know what's going on. Everyone has an extra minute.

[sharkman29]

Originally Posted by tbone2u

I don't believe I have ever ghosted anyone. I may have missed one or 2 appointments but I let them know at the last minute and paid for the time I missed the next time I saw them. It only takes a minute to let the other person know what's going on. Everyone has an extra minute.

Agree 100%.

[AcetheJace]

Originally Posted by tbone2u

It only takes a minute to let the other person know what's going on. Everyone has an extra minute.

I completely agree!

[MarcellusWalluz]

Ghosting around here ? Say it isn't so ! Lol, yes it happens & it is frustrating but it comes with the territory. Put them on your DNS list as I do & just move on.

[AcetheJace]

Thanks! I'll do just that.

[ICU 812]

"Ghosting"?

I'm an older guy and not so current with new dating terms or trends.

Whisky-Tango-Foxtrot interrogative (Emphatic)

[Fizley]

I have said this vefire ok, and will say it again, I look at Flakes differently. I look at them as an opportunity to get out of the house.

Flakes are great! Yes they are a waste of time, but look at the bright side....you still have your $250! Instead of her showing, taking your $250, and given lack luster service, you had a drive which got you out of the house.

Instead find a new restaurant you have never eaten at, have a beer, then send her a picture of the money,food, beer,on the bar saying this could of been yours... instead you flaked.

Flakes are not necessarily a bad thing, as they show you the real soul of the person.

[Fizley]

I have said this before, and will say it again, I look at Flakes differently. I look at them as an opportunity to get out of the house.

Flakes are great! Yes they are a waste of time, but look at the bright side....you still have your $250! She did not have the courtesy to send you a three second text advising something came up! What kind of service do you think you would have received if she had shown up?

Instead,you got out of the house, had a drive somewhere new, find a new restaurant you have never eaten at, have a beer, then send her a picture of the money,food, beer,on the bar saying this could of been yours... instead you flaked.

Flakes are not necessarily a bad thing, as they show you the real soul of the person.

[Tiffany Dash]

I have never had anyone flake on me but I pay close attention when I'm booking an appointment. Like if someone ask too many questions about little things or seem too picky. I look at them as someone who is looking for phone sex or just a convo and I usually don't give them the opportunity to book. Another red flag is someone who is complaining about where you are located, they might ghost or make up an excuse last minute. Basically, I only talk to people who seem eager and serious about meeting.


A little more advice, I am serious during booking but I also make sure that I sound inviting. I think men feel discouraged to book when we just are cut & dry or just say "yes" and "no". I get that some guys ask a lot of questions and yes, it can be annoying, but as I said, I usually look at them as time wasters. Also, if a guy ask about services, I usually don't take them serious. But what I learned in the beginning, a guy who ask for a service that knows from reviews that you don't offer it or you tell them you don't offer it & they seem bummed out, they might be a flake. But also, you shouldn't talk services anyways because talking services for compensation is illegal. They should know what this is about already.


I hope this helps you hun & if you have questions or need a little advice I am just a PM away.


Nice body!

[ICU 812]

So . . is "Ghosting" like being a no-show?

Is it committing to multiple providers and only showing for one of them?

Help an old 'Boomer generation hobbyist get this right.

[cabletex7]

I don't take it personally. To me a non-response is the same as someone responding and saying no. I also don't have a problem with it. To me it's even understandable. People generally don't like conflict. Sure, I'm curious and would like to know the reason but I just move on. You certainly don't want to turn into a stalker and blow up her PMs/texts. Because if she had any doubts about seeing you or not, you've just put them to rest.

edit: I'm referring to where no firm date and time has been scheduled and you were just exchanging texts/PMs. Once something is scheduled and if there is no cancellation, then that's just NC/NS.

[Porkchops90]

I understand life happens, maybe some of you will make an exception to an ATF doing it or someone that gives a good excuse but I definitely would just ignore completely if they do it to me once. It’s kind of a given if you ghost a provider they likely will never talk to you again or upcharge you for a missed appointment.

Maybe I’m just naturally cautious.