To OKAY or NOT OKAY

[Guest031811]

Footlong,

I didn’t want to hijack your excellent thread on provider recommendations. Your thread caused my gears to turn. I wanted to get everyone’s perspective on client recommendations.

I’ve noticed a huge disconnect between men and women for the criteria based on providing a vouch.

Most gentlemen believe an “OKAY” should be given to him when:

1. He has seen the escort and paid her
2. He is not a cop or a serial killer

I have found that escorts have a completely different criteria based on providing a vouch or “preferred-411 okay”. I’ll give a “HELL YES!” for reasons that would make most men turn their heads to the side and say, “huh?”. I’ve had ladies make me swear to God that I would treat their ATFs with the BEST service.

On the flip side, sometimes gentlemen will request that I give them a vouch or “p-411 okay”, and I feel really uncomfortable doing so. I am often embarrassed to tell gentlemen why I feel so uncomfortable about it.

I know some gentlemen will refuse to review a lady, will not recommend her to his friends, and will not see her again because he wasn’t satisfied with her. Whereas other gentlemen would rather post a negative review. Both are fair.

Parallel: If an escort feels uncomfortable giving you a vouch, what is the best way for her to handle it?

For example:

“I felt that this gentleman’s personal hygiene was questionable. It made me very uncomfortable, and I wasn’t able to enjoy him. I would not see him again.”
OR

“I’d rather not provide a vouch for this gentleman. I cannot give him a p-411 okay.”


As an escort, if I am calling for a vouch, I want to know WHY another lady says YES or NO.

-Yes, I love seeing this guy. He is hilarious. He really makes you comfortable.
-No, I would not see him again. This gentleman was very rough with me even when I asked him to slow down; I was in a lot of pain.

But, on the flipside, I could see where the negative comments could be hurtful.


What's the most effective manner?

[sanantonioman37]

Be honest, whether its negative or positive. Me, personally..............if I suck at something or stink, then I want to know so I can improve on myself. I tend to be quiet during a session and some providers find that annoying but that is just me. Sometimes when I'm not quiet I tend to put my foot in my mouth. So either way just be honest.
Thats my two cents.

[lisa.lisa0302]

Tricky question.

Some ladies leave out stuff, that could help with decision making. Each person is so different.

One lady may have a stinky guy come along, she may not give him an okay, I may give him an okay if the gent was content with jumping into the shower at my incall. He was offered the opportunity to fix the problem. And he fixed it.

Also I think it depends on tolerance levels, some people dislike talking, some like a tiny bit aggressiveness, while others don't. But I do believe in communication. Give the person a chance to correct a problem. They may be okay with it and accommodate.

Good question

[Pepper_Springfield]

There should be more options on the ok's. That would make it a lot easier. We should do some here also, that way in case you cant get a hold of refrences quickly enough, then at least you can see if there are ok's for the person and decide from there. Sometimes it takes a while to get those references.

[Crispy1969]

So instead of OK then would y'all prefer a Rating System?

[Pepper_Springfield]

Si rating system sounds good to me

[blaktygre]

with that rating system perhaps there could be an "'additional comments" section added to it so the ladies could explain the reasons why they gave hobbiest XYZ a 3 rating. a 3 for one lady may be a 7 for another..the more information added the better.

ps~i get to be under pepper..yummy

[shavedmale93]

I am all for a rating system on clients. The providers are doing just that providing and they should have a right to provide to those they wish. I know, yes we do pay for a service, but like almost any public enterprise the proprietor has a right to refuse service to whomever they chose. In addition just like the sign says "no shoes, no shoes, no service" should these fine ladies have their own minimum level of expectation in order to provide us with their services. Underneath Post and Reviews, we could add rating. Well that’s my 2 cents at least. have fun everyone.

[bh-antonio]

Maybe the providers could review us in their provider's only area. I personally would have no problem with it because I believe I treat everyone with respect and dignity. As long as they don't rate my performence. LOL

[Pepper_Springfield]

We have done something like that on different sites, but it would be much easier if it was underneath posts and reviews like shavedmale93 suggested.

[atxdream]

Perhaps I am in the minority opinion, but I think the grading scale should be left to the hobbyists to complete. I am in a service oriented industry. In what other service oriented business do you get to "review the customer"? I like the p411 system with a simple "ok". If I want/need more than that, I directly contact the provider. If I don't want to give someone an ok, I explain the reason and give them the opportunity to correct it, if possible. P411 had a query a few months back on whether or not they should allow a one line comment to explain whether or not the provider gave an ok and also the hobbyist would be allowed a one line comment to defend themselves (Gina, chime in if I explained that wrong).

Information about whether the guy was clean, handsome, a good performer, etc is useful information but not necessary for the point of a reference. If hygiene is a problem (and I've only had that happen once) I simply direct them to the shower and fresh towels. Everytime since then, he has started each session with a shower and became a wonderful regular. Rough play to one, might be a turn on for the next. If you communicate clearly with your hobbyists, they will usually rise to the occassion. But the bottom line is that unless he is unsafe or LE, there will always be a provider who is willing to cater to his needs.

I know a lot of providers don't want to offend someone and potentially get a bad review, but there are wonderful ways of nicely/sensitively talking about things. If you do it right, they will certainly appreciate the feedback.

In the providers perspective, don't we want the same courtesy? One weekend most of the hotels were full, so I booked an incall that was not one of my normal places. When i arrived, I was a little concerned about it, but didn't have time to look for something else. I pulled out my bag of tricks and did everything I could to get rid of dust, dirt, and smell. After the appointment, the hobbyist said that he would not see me anymore if it was at that location. I agreed with him and never booked there again. I appreciated the feedback and had several more appts with him, NOT at the initial location.

Negative comments are hurtful, especially when the described person is not given an opportunity to change. Constructive comments are helpful to both parties.

I tend to write more than "he's ok" response to a reference request as a courtesy to the provider; however, many providers won't provide a reference at all, so if I get a "he's ok" response sent to me, I'm ok with that. If I have a particular concern, I ask them for more info. I had a client where the provider told me she would not recommend him. When I asked why, she said he had really terrible breath. His other refs came back ok, so I followed up with them if they had a problem with smelly breath and they said no. The day I saw him, he tasted like he had just used mouthwash.

[atxdream]

Are you worried that if your performence is rated, your inbox will reach it's maximum with requests from the ladies?

Originally Posted by bh-antonio

Maybe the providers could review us in their provider's only area. I personally would have no problem with it because I believe I treat everyone with respect and dignity. As long as they don't rate my performence. LOL

[Sa_artman]

While I don't see it here happening anytime soon, this site (and it's former self) has always operated a little tighter than others. Maybe that's why it works. IDK. At any rate, as Shavedmale said, it is a business and that can work two ways. Besides reviews, if providers had a star or rating, imagine the hits to your filler business (those quickies who you forget a day later -) when the average isn't in your favor? I think in the long run providers will still pm behind the scenes and forgo any rating system. Maybe a rating system viewable only by providers?

Just my 0.2505 peso.

-edit on further thoughts after reading Britanny's other post (how did I miss that juicy exchange? c'mon Jsmith, that was harsh even for me)- I've been hobbying way to long, but I know I see a lot of providers only once, mostly because I like variety (or else I wouldn't be doing it-duh). I'm sure the only indelible impression I've left has been my $$. I don't think I'm in the minority in this respect. I like my HDH when I'm doing some distance traveling, but around here, it's whoever picks up the phone, has a decent review and won't cause me to itch 7 days later. Personally, I've never given any thought to whether I was 'recommended' or not and quite frankly, and I hope I don't offend (like that has ever stopped me), money is very persuasive. I think though some providers here might glance at a rating system and keep to their atf, but when it comes down to I don't see it being very effectual.

ps. I'm always showered, brushed and clean

[Guest031811]

I can understand why a "rating system" for gentlemen is a bad idea, especially if the gentleman really wants his hobby life kept private. I agree that as an escort, it is NEVER OKAY to rate performance, because it is MY PURPOSE to please and satisfy the hobbyist. I am here to make sure that he has an excellent time and enjoys himself.


[quote=atxdream;629895] I know a lot of providers don't want to offend someone and potentially get a bad review... [quote]

I think this is a big issue for me. Its a huge fear of mine that a gentleman may become vindictive if I bring up a sensitive topic. How do you KINDLY tell someone that you were terrified of him the entire time that he was with you?

In all honesty, I'd have to say that 99% of the people (men and women) that I've gotten to meet in this hobby are phenomenal people. I get the opportunity to meet gentlemen with really interesting careers/lifestyles, and not only that, but I get to see them as incredibly hot, sexual beings. So, this thread is about that 1%, where the experience is incredibly unpleasant.

[Likinikki]

If providers would be willing to be 100% honest with a rating, or if you can get them to even post a rating...it may be beneficial. However, just as some of the SA providers do not contribute to these threads...I doubt they'll even be interested in posting a rating for a hobbyist.