"What I did on my Summer Vacation" By ToYz

[Toyz]

I have just returned from a long & fruitful journey that took me well beyond the boundaries of our safe confines of Austin.


My trip was fraught with challenge & intrigue, danger & adventure witches & warlocks. I was witness to many amazing sights, many sad departures. I hobknobbed with wizards & dined with kings. Bedded princesses & seduced queens (of the female persuasion). But ultimately the quest was successful as the troll was slain.


I began this crusade one morning when a dear friend was going through a very public mental breakdown. This was not unusual for him & most had quit listening to his crazy talk, but I felt compassion for him as he really has no one in the world who pays him any mind. However, I could not stay around & console him as my blade & cunning were needed elsewhere.


I began my journey heading north with my sad donkey Eeyore in tow. Incliment weather was my first obstacle as I ran into a Dallas Rain which produced a massive Sue Nami. I wanted to find the coveted Sweetest Jewels as I was told they would cure the ills of our village. I also knew I would be forced to deal with many hardships before I could claim them as my own.


My first day on the trail I was attacked by a group of ankle biting Pocket MODS, but they proved to be nothing more than pests-slowing my quest, but not stopping me.


After the rain subsided, there was a beautiful Rainblow on the horizon which was followed by a quite spectacular Rosiedaie. I pushed on into the night & crossed the path of a Roving Greek smoking some odd scented Junkweed. We sat by the campfire & shared tales & stories of old. I bade he should share with me clues as to where to find my treasure, and all he could provide was to seek the counsel of one Governmentguru.

The dawn of my second day in the wilderness I was quite famished…I came up a group of wandering gypsies who seem to be led by an old Knotty Man. He was stirring a pot over a roaring fire & asked if I would care to share some Swaghetti Yolonaise with him. I thanked him for the offer, sat down, reached into my sack pulling out some Spicy Latina & asked him to “Mix in This”, which he smiled & did.

My hunger abated, I continued my trek northward to seek out the Admin Gods. Hoping to gain their audience to request a poultice…or a vaccine…some miracle drug to cure the cancerous scourge that had plagued our community lo these many years. I thought to myself “Readysetgo” you can do this! I knew in my heart of hearts that I needed to rise2theoccasion. Off in the distance I heard the echoes of a Bugle Boy blowing a beautiful note. This spurred me on, so I quickened my pace. I made good time over the next few hours & came upon a pub being run by this Rouge Gent. Wise beyond his years he was as he quickly determined the nature of my quest & said “I see you are Still Looking”?


I told him what I knew regarding my mission, to which he replied “that’s UtterNonsense”, you need to go to the Fairy in the woods named fun2come & he’ll guide you in the right direction. I said “you mean a little fairy with wings & magic”. “No, he said”. “It’s a fat gay dude that runs a Bavarian Nut shop up north”

Fortified by this new found knowledge, I again hit the dusty trail. I saw this Lioness by the road who merely licked her paws as I walked by & winked. She beckoned me return & said “watch for the little monster and the centaur up the road a ways, they can be ill spirited when provoked”

That night I pitched my tent by a BabblingBabyBrook & tried to rest for the final leg of my journey. My sleep was not restful as I had a terrible NightmareSally.



I woke up, had some breakfast under a purpletree & continued onward.
{{{This ends Act I}}}

[RandB fan]

May I have some of the "punch" you drank while on vacation?

[Iron Butterfly]

happy trails.

IB

[Toyz]

Originally Posted by RandB fan

May I have some of the "punch" you drank while on vacation?

Sure its very expensive though...

Just send $37.50 to Toyz Industreez & ask for "some of that shit". We'll hook you up.

[Mike Vronsky]

LMAO!!! That is funny. You forgot the trolls are disintegrating!

Troll_.jpg

[Noid]

Your storytelling, like TKD leaves a lot to be desired. (sucks)

[Mike Vronsky]

And yours? Guess someone is jealous here!

Originally Posted by Noid

Your storytelling, like TKD leaves a lot to be desired. (sucks)

[Toyz]

Originally Posted by dante0322

And yours? Guess someone is jealous here!

Nah, 'Roid is just a hater! Go read his posting history...just an angry old fuck, but harmless. He's like dick cheese after camping 3 days without a shower...you just scrape him off.

This is how he gets his 15 minutes of attention.

[Mike Vronsky]

Nah, no interest in reading his posting history. Don't want to get bored.

Originally Posted by Toyz

Nah, 'Roid is just a hater! Go read his posting history...just an angry old fuck, but harmless. He's like dick cheese after camping 3 days without a shower...you just scrape him off.

This is how he gets his 15 minutes of attention.