OUTED BY A POULAR PROVIDER who posts here. What would you do?

[pyramider]

Boo.

[nwarounder]

I think it's real simple. If you care that someone else gets hurt (possibly far worse than you), out her. If you don't, you cared enough to teach us something. Thanks either way.

[brandilynn]

You should of let her employer know.

[Cpalmson]

Well since an alert now is like water over the dam, it probably does no good for your situation; however, it could happen to someone else. I think outting the screener is definitely warranted. If there's collateral damage with regard to the provider, so be it. I'd word the alert as to not directly blame the provider, but she should be mentioned. Maybe it will serve as a wake up call not only for her but for other providers who use outside "help".

[Still Looking]

Where it is a provider or anyone associated with a provider, pimp, agency, baby sitter who cares! They are responsible and should be dealt with harshly! Outing is irreprehensible!

[Fancyinheels]

Originally Posted by Sweet N Little

....I wouldn't trust the Secret Service to screen for me! (well you know what I mean lol)....

There are so many nuances and warning signs that could be missed. Unless a gentleman is a member here with multiple reviews or on P411 with multiple Okays (and then I still contact one or two of those providers for their perspectives), I want to actually SPEAK to him first. Gives me a better sense of their personality, and if I get a bad vibe, there's usually a reason. On the positive side, in a conversation (or even a series of conversational emails) I might discover that the fellow and I have a shared interest or commonality, or once I know more about him I might come up with something that will happily surprise him. Either will make the visit more pleasant and memorable.

Nope, not trusting anybody but myself to choose my clients, because a screener is doing exactly that. She/he evaluates any info obtained (and there are methods the screener may not think of or know about) and makes the decision to send the fellow along or try to set an appointment for him. I don't like giving up my power like that. Guess I do have a wee bit of a control freak streak.

[Cpalmson]

Originally Posted by Fancyinheels

There are so many nuances and warning signs that could be missed. Unless a gentleman is a member here with multiple reviews or on P411 with multiple Okays (and then I still contact one or two of those providers for their perspectives), I want to actually SPEAK to him first. Gives me a better sense of their personality, and if I get a bad vibe, there's usually a reason. On the positive side, in a conversation (or even a series of conversational emails) I might discover that the fellow and I have a shared interest or commonality, or once I know more about him I might come up with something that will happily surprise him. Either will make the visit more pleasant and memorable.

Nope, not trusting anybody but myself to choose my clients, because a screener is doing exactly that. She/he evaluates any info obtained (and there are methods the screener may not think of or know about) and makes the decision to send the fellow along or try to set an appointment for him. I don't like giving up my power like that. Guess I do have a wee bit of a control freak streak.

Your screening methods are like my research methods. You are so right. Extended conversation (e-mail, text or phone) gives great insight into the other person's personality. It is almost like a form of foreplay in and of itself and makes for a better overall session.

[Eva Damita]

Moral obligation...not an excuse here. It seems to me that this wouldn't be the first time...especially if she didn't buddy up with your GF recently. And, likely, the provider HAS to know, as this may cost her her business.

[awl4knot]

Other than this being a sad but stale story, what's the lesson? I don't know what the OP could have done to prevent this other than not give out his name as part of the initial screening. And isn't it a bit naïve to think that a screener with multiple clients doesn't keep a data base of client info?

I am on P411 with lots of okays. I post lots of reviews. I have plenty of good references. With these things in place, I am increasingly uncomfortable with giving out my name. If an agency or indie won't take the time to do a hobbyist safe due diligence, then I don't know if I can trust them.

I deal with an agency that asks for my cell # every time I book with them because they don't keep it on file. I like that.

[gimme_that]

Originally Posted by nwarounder

I think it's real simple. If you care that someone else gets hurt (possibly far worse than you), out her. If you don't, you cared enough to teach us something. Thanks either way.

This seems the perfect response.

But I messed up by using my name for screening. It was one of the only times I did that, and it came back to bite me in the ass. But you have to start somewhere, so choose your ladies carefully in any regard. That was the only lesson I could offer my experience on.

I don't have any reason to out or expose anyone. Its a really serious accusation and since I don't know definitively if she was involved I didn't pursue. And simply contacting her wasn't as easy as people may post it could have been because the screener had full access. But more importantly at the time since I wasn't hobbying while in a relationship.....my principal focal point was to mend my relationship which didn't happen.

If I had been beaten, robbed, cash n dash, arrested, or worse I would post in a heartbeat. This tended to be a more delicate situation, and I guess I was just wondering how others would have handled this in retrospect. All in all I weighed the negatives with the positives of posting what I knew and the negatives far outweighed the good.....wasn't worth the drama and stigma.

I understand all sides of the debate and welcomed your continued opinion.

There no agenda here. And the only reason I put popular provider in the title was to attract attention to it. She is popular, and this was a real situation, I just made a decision way before this thread I wouldn't pursue but always wonder what if I did it. My OJ moment I guess............

[Guest011914-1]

I am so sorry this happened to you and it just reinforces my position neither the lady nor the gentleman needs to know certain personal information for screening for a first date and another example in my opinion why bookers...schedulers...screene rs what you want to call them is a bad idea and I think deceptive on the providers part for hiding the fact they have someone else handling or helping with their buisness.....just sayin my 2 cents

[alluringava]

Do it my way. Find the bitch and beat the shit out of her MMA style.

[Guest021824]

[pyramider]

Originally Posted by alluringava

Do it my way. Find the bitch and beat the shit out of her MMA style.

But she might be able to carry her luggage up the stairs.

[Eccie Addict]

Originally Posted by gimme_that

This seems the perfect response.

But I messed up by using my name for screening. It was one of the only times I did that, and it came back to bite me in the ass. But you have to start somewhere, so choose your ladies carefully in any regard. That was the only lesson I could offer my experience on.

I don't have any reason to out or expose anyone. Its a really serious accusation and since I don't know definitively if she was involved I didn't pursue. And simply contacting her wasn't as easy as people may post it could have been because the screener had full access. But more importantly at the time since I wasn't hobbying while in a relationship.....my principal focal point was to mend my relationship which didn't happen.

If I had been beaten, robbed, cash n dash, arrested, or worse I would post in a heartbeat. This tended to be a more delicate situation, and I guess I was just wondering how others would have handled this in retrospect. All in all I weighed the negatives with the positives of posting what I knew and the negatives far outweighed the good.....wasn't worth the drama and stigma.

I understand all sides of the debate and welcomed your continued opinion.

There no agenda here. And the only reason I put popular provider in the title was to attract attention to it. She is popular, and this was a real situation, I just made a decision way before this thread I wouldn't pursue but always wonder what if I did it. My OJ moment I guess............

Some might consider a divorce and other things that could come along with it just as bad as being robbed or beaten. Will anyone's answers here change your position? If not then what's the point ya know