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Old 09-05-2013, 03:15 PM   #16
guy fawkes
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Redd Foxx

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Do you realize that if the pilgrims have been chasing bobcats instead of turkeys... we'd all be eating pussy on Thanksgiving?!

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A girl's legs are her best friends... but even the best of friends must part.
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A man is in a hotel lobby. He wants to ask the clerk a question. As he turns to go to the front desk, he accidentally bumps into a woman beside him and as he does, his elbow goes into her breast. They are both quite startled. The man turns to her and says, "Ma'am, if your heart is as soft as your breast, I know you'll forgive me." She replies, "if your penis is as hard as your elbow, I'm in room 1221.
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Old 09-05-2013, 03:21 PM   #17
Alyssa XOXO
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Talking

[QUOTE=DDMcGee;1052555790]One night a man and a woman are both at a bar knocking back a few beers. They start talking and come to realize that they're both doctors. After about an hour, the man says to the woman, Hey. How about if we sleep together tonight. No strings attached. It'll just be one night of fun. The woman doctor agrees to it. So they go back to her place and he goes in the bedroom. She goes in the bathroom and starts scrubbing up like she's about to go into the operating room. She scrubs for a good 10 minutes. Finally she goes in the bedroom and they have sex for an hour or so. Afterwards, the man says to the woman, You're a surgeon, aren't you? Yeah, how did you know? The man says, I could tell by the way you scrubbed up before we started. Oh, that makes sense, says the woman. Youre an anesthesiologist aren't you? Yeah, says the man, a bit surprised. How did you know? The woman answers, Because I didn't feel a thing.

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Old 09-05-2013, 05:54 PM   #18
Charlottehoney
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Default Man's best friend.....

A young man noticed that his relationship with his girlfriend had become stale. He asked a friend what he should do. The friend suggested the man should cover his genitals in honey and get his girlfriend to lick the honey off.

He decides to do this, he gets home early from work and covers himself in honey and lies on the bed waiting for his girlfriend to come home.

She arrives and enters the room, she’s horrified “that's disgusting” she yells “why would you think i would do that?!” she turns to leave.... just as she does the man yells. “wait! before you go.........send in the dog”.
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