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coast_encounter · 03-02-2011, 03:17 PM

I had that kind of pain when I was younger. I had a bad breakup with a long term GF that I dated from HS to College. It wasn't my first love but I would say probably one of the most intense loves of my life. After we broke up, I am pretty sure, I has some clinical depression because I lost my appetite, slept all the time and was completely bummed out for months. I guess the only thing that helped was I had some good friends that were there for me and brought me out of my depression. Time does heal all wounds but it does take time. I have had several relationships since then and a few break ups here and there but I guess I never let myself fall that much in love ever since that one. It is probably a defense mechanism on my part but it affected me so bad that I never wanted to feel that way again. I can definitely sympathize with you. Friends and Family can help. Good Luck SNL. Sorry to hear of your heart ache.

charlestudor2005 · 03-02-2011, 03:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sweet N Little

So when u end a relationship , how do u deal with the pain?

The only thing I can say is my thoughts and prayers are with you in your loss. There are a lot of people here who are on your side in this. Don't be afraid to reach out if you need one of them.

Remember, you are a beautiful person.

London Rayne · 03-02-2011, 03:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by charlestudor2005

The only thing I can say is my thoughts and prayers are with you in your loss. There are a lot of people here who are on your side in this. Don't be afraid to reach out if you need one of them.

Remember, you are a beautiful person.

Awww.

Dartswinger · 03-02-2011, 04:01 PM

SNL. The pain is directly proportional to the love you lost. That's why you hurt so bad right now. Know that there is no quick fix, but if you leave your heart open just a little and try to help some other person you WILL find love and joy again. When ever I've felt really bad I always find that there is some one some where near you that needs your help. Cry for now, but the sooner you find someone to help...They will help you. And day by day you will feel better. And you WILL find Love and Joy again.

London Rayne · 03-02-2011, 04:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dartswinger

SNL. The pain is directly proportional to the love you lost. That's why you hurt so bad right now. Know that there is no quick fix, but if you leave your heart open just a little and try to help some other person you WILL find love and joy again. When ever I've felt really bad I always find that there is some one some where near you that needs your help. Cry for now, but the sooner you find someone to help...They will help you. And day by day you will feel better. And you WILL find Love and Joy again.

Great advice...I do this myself. The minute you get your mind off of YOU and your pain to help another, you will be taken care of.

Valerie · 03-02-2011, 04:05 PM

SNL....I could tell you I'm sorry all day long, but it wont make you feel better...I hate to see people hurting from relationships and my heart truly goes out to you. It is one of the worst & painful experiences one can ever have....

We are all different in how we deal with these emotions, whereas some like to go out, be around people, I tend to want to be alone, and I write...You really do have to take things 1 day at a time, and embrace your grieving period, because it will help you heal. I think it is much better to deal with deep issues such as these rather than put them to the side and "try not to think about it"....of course you're going to think about it, regardless if the guys was a douche or the love of your life...

I can't tell you if you will ever fully recover, as I don't know the situation you're in, (I say this only because my heart still bleeds for a certain man, and always will.)..but it will get easier each day that passes and hopefully make you stronger...

You are a beautiful, intelligent, and kind person, any man would be lucky to have you. Should you need anyone to talk to, you are more than welcome to phone me love...

I really hope you can find some peace...

**Now** I want you to go download "Everything's not lost" by coldplay....and really listen to the lyrics

Jackie S · 03-02-2011, 04:18 PM

Sweet & Little, all things seem minor after you have the love of your life contract a terminal illness, and you are holding Her hand when she takes Her last breath.

But life does go on, and trust me, time does ease the heartache.

wildwooly1 · 03-02-2011, 04:43 PM

SNL, I am truly sorry for the sadness you are enduring but remember there will always be someboday to come along and replace the one you lost.
Besides you have all us crazy folks on eccie that love you !!

Sweet N Little · 03-02-2011, 04:56 PM

Thanks y'all, it's just pain & I will deal with it, it's gonna be ok I'm sure, I just don't have a back up plan,
I just hate that sick part in my stomach , I will b fine , it just hurts bad

I'm so stupid .(

TexTushHog · 03-02-2011, 05:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sweet N Little

So when u end a relationship , how do u deal with the pain?

Year 1 - 2: Major depressive episode.
Year 1 - 5: General anxiety disorder.
Year 1 - 7: Psychiatric treatment.
Year 1 - 8: Semi-bad transitional relationship.
Year 3 - present: dysthymia.
Year 5 - present: situational anxiety.
Year 1 - present psychiatric meds.

That more or less covers it.

Naomi4u · 03-02-2011, 05:03 PM

Um. Wow. No further comment.

Guest101811-4 · 03-02-2011, 05:11 PM

I'm not going to even remotely pretend that I know you SNL, but I can say with some certainty that I know (to a degree anyway) what you're feeling. My marriage is dying right now, and the separation and divorce is all but a foregone conclusion.

Just know that the pain will pass, and you WILL find happiness again. It's always darkest before the dawn...

shorty · 03-02-2011, 05:13 PM

That was wrong TexTushHog!!

Eccie Addict · 03-02-2011, 05:22 PM

SNL- stupid is not the word for you.... We all make decisions one of two ways. With our minds or our emotions. Usually if it's with our minds it is with whatever info we have available to make the best decision we believe is right. If it's with emotions then it's normally based on how right we "feel". I don't know your situation but no matter what decision you made that led you down this path it doesn't make you stupid, it makes you human.

One thing I do know is this. Most of us don't let that pain go until the pain of holding on is greater than the pain of letting go. When that balance shifts then you will start feeling better. There is a lot of good advice here and all of it will help you in some way. What has worked for me in the past is laughter and people to talk to. I hope that you find what works for you soon so that the pain you feel now will start to ease.....

LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL

That one is for TexasGator.... lol

am-a-pleaser · 03-02-2011, 05:54 PM

Dealing with the pain. I worked longer hours, dated a lot, discovered a friend of mine was going through much worse and in comforting her, my hurt seemed to lose focus. It was nice to have a sympathetic person I'd known for a long time just being there.

Spending some time alone, some time with friends, some time making new friends. I tried to keep busy, focusing on other things. After a while, the pain lessens.

Take care as best you can SnL. My thoughts are with with.