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carmenryder · 03-17-2018, 11:02 PM

What's the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms ?
One's a Goodyear. The other's a great year

James1588 · 03-18-2018, 02:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by carmenryder

What's the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms ?
One's a Goodyear. The other's a great year

Well, either that, or it's a great night for a hundred or so people!

Good one!

HoustonRiley · 03-18-2018, 04:23 PM

Lol

Dom Vera · 03-21-2018, 01:34 PM

What does the sign on an out of business brothel say?

Beat it! We’re closed.

Sig9er · 03-21-2018, 02:18 PM

Had a great real estate transaction today; I sold a warehouse to a dyslexic pimp.

Mrhazyman · 03-21-2018, 04:27 PM

It's hard for me to believe that I was gay and deslexic.... I was in Daniel.

Sig9er · 03-21-2018, 05:05 PM

Had a mate who said he hit the jackpot, as his girl sent him a text that she loved anal. Dyslexic bitch.... she was in love with his best friend Alan.

Sig9er · 03-21-2018, 05:07 PM

Fell for this blind Sheila I met at a bar. Started dating, things got a lil hot n' heavy. She told me I was the largest bloke she had ever seen. Come to find out, she was just pulling my leg.

Mrhazyman · 03-21-2018, 05:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sig9er

Had a mate who said he hit the jackpot, as his girl sent him a text that she loved anal. Dyslexic bitch.... she was in love with his best friend Alan.

Dyslexics of the world...UNTIE!

carmenryder · 03-22-2018, 07:20 AM

What's worse than waking up at a party and finding a penis drawn on your face?
Finding out it was traced.

garhkal · 03-26-2018, 01:39 PM

A crown prince is regaling his glory days to one of his legitimate grand kids...
"I'm ashamed to say that before and after my first marriage I, myself, fathered at least two illegitimate children: one with an Austrian countess, another with a French prostitute who was known in court circles as Madame L'Amour. Both of them, incidentally, blackmailed me for huge sums of money, the Countess and the prostitute. I expected better of the prostitute."

Anon91 · 07-19-2018, 06:49 PM

A woman wants to get rich quick, so she decides to marry a rich old feller. She thinks that on the honeymoon she'll just romp him to death.

On the honeymoon the gold digging "wife"gets dressed in her most slutty clothes. On seeing this, the old husband quickly rushes into the bathroom. After awhile he emerges with a 12" erection covered with a condom, earplugs and nose plugs.

Fearing her plan might not work she asks. "What are the nose and ear plugs for?"

"Well" the husband replies. "If there are two things i can't stand, its the sound of a screaming woman and the smell of burning rubber".