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Diamonds and Tuxedos Glamour, elegance, and sophistication. That's what it's all about here in ECCIE's newest forum which caters to those with expensive tastes, lavish lifestyles, and an appetite for upscale entertainment.

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Old 09-06-2011, 01:21 PM   #1
NinaBrooke
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Default "The Erotic Capital" - (Hakim)

Hello Eccie,

Here is what crossed my mind lately, a book by

Catherine Hakim - The Erotic Capital:
About the Power of Attraction in the Boardroom and in the Bedroom


"In 2010, pioneering sociologist Catherine Hakim shocked the world with a provocative new theory: In addition to the three recognized personal assets (economic, cultural, and social capital), each individual has a fourth asset—erotic capital—that he or she can, and should, use to advance within society.
In this bold and controversial book, Hakim explores the applications and significance of erotic capital, challenging the disapproval meted out to women and men who use sex appeal to get ahead in life. Social scientists have paid little serious attention to these modes of personal empowerment, despite overwhelming evidence of their importance. In Erotic Capital, Hakim marshals a trove of research to show that rather than degrading those who employ it, erotic capital represents a powerful and potentially equalizing tool—one that we scorn only to our own detriment." (Amazon)


I have recently read some splendid reviews about the above mentioned book but unfortunately i have not had the chance yet to read thru it myself to build a more thorough and cut-thru opinion.
It seems to be quite contradictionary and i can - so far agree with both sides of the story, which at one side points out that erotic capital can be a backlash into patriarchy, and helps men exploit women, but on the other side i see, especially in the erotic entertainment world the notion that erotic capital is something positive a really good approach. Has someone read the book?

Here are two contradicting reviews, the first review is made by Maggie McNeil aka "The Honest Courtesan" :

" Hakim suggests that there is nothing wrong or immoral with women using their looks and sexuality to get ahead, and that one of the reasons patriarchal societies have suppressed women’s sexuality is to prevent our using that sexuality to our advantage.
Anyone in her right mind knows that women already do this, and anyone who really cares about the happiness and self-actualization of women should be glad someone with Dr. Hakim’s reputation and credentials has pointed it out. [...] The idea that young, intelligent third-wave feminists and {gasp!} women who don’t identify as feminists at all might be able to use their feminine charms to outcompete aging, pudgy, bitchy second-wave feminists isn’t going to sit well with the latter, who are naturally going to reject the realization that if female sexuality is indeed a form of capital, they’ve been essentially using cash as toilet paper for decades."

here`s the link to the full article: http://maggiemcneill.wordpress.com/2...e-their-faces/

A similar intriguing review has been written in amazon, who portrays the dangers of said capital for women:
Beware of bad advice : Using Honey Money in the workplace:

"There seems to be an increasingly vocal minority of highly successful women who bizarrely believe that sex discrimination no longer occurs in the workplace or elsewhere and who, are now advocating that you, as a woman, should go ahead and exploit your femininity and behave in a manner in the workplace - or wherever and however else you encounter men - that is essentially about pandering to their needs by you flirting and using "erotic capital".
In Honey Money Hakim is effectively saying just use your `erotic capital' and voilà, you may find a rich man, but certainly life will become easier because men will treat you better. So THAT's how women can be successful in today's society?! Wow! Who thought it could be so utterly straightforward as that. All you need to do is "smile", flutter your eyelids, maybe wear high heels, dress in body-shape-enhancing clothes, use a certain appealing tone of voice and - oh! - please don't worry if you or others think you're not pretty; no, says Hakim, erotic capital is really all about your attitude. In other words: flirt away to any guy that has any power over you or if you think you want to influence him. A woman should always please the men in their lives. I mean, this sort of nonsense is being spouted by a senior academic at one of the leading British universities. "

read the full review here: http://www.amazon.com/Erotic-Capital...4579135&sr=8-1
I think both opinions have their pros and cons and i personally give Hakim credit for pointing out good things about the Sex Industry, as following:

"Is Hakim seriously suggesting that prostitution should be legalised, that surrogate pregnancy is an untapped income stream for women, that pimping is a good thing ("a win-win arrangement") and that the extent of human trafficking has been whipped up by the media to provide "the latest excuse for moral panics and crusades over the sex industry"


I hope you enjoy reading and its not an overly long too long posts. I will spare you with further opinions and swing into discussing this one with you guys later :-) Enjoy, looking forward to interesting discussions .....
Nina
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Old 09-06-2011, 02:46 PM   #2
Chloe Kensington
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I incline toward Maggie McNeil - without reading the book and I'm sure I never will.

But the idea of 'erotic capital' is just naming a very real entity that helps shape all our lives, a very real power relation.

Twenty and thirty years ago the idea of rape was more amorphous for example, the actuality way more hidden. Because of rape activists I think we all tend to be more conscious about sexual trangressions these days. In some ways. Rape isn't so acceptable or hidden anymore, but then putting out for peer acceptance in America is... I could go on.

Still, I think consciousness of rape has grown and is a positive thing. Maybe consciousness of sexual capital is also. It's what we all know - women have a limited shelf life and lots of types of female power diminish according to perceived attractiveness and age.

This isn't new, what's so wrong about acknowledging it?

I hope becoming more conscious of sexual capital is useful. But maybe it's just a name and an argument for the well-known, no real contribution at all except for academics who tend to like to argue - and get paid for - arguing about the obvious.
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Old 09-07-2011, 12:39 AM   #3
London Rayne
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Aww Nina, how I love your posts!! It's never the same old bs! I cannot wait to meet you!!

I do agree with you Chloe..saw the new name he he. I think sex was always more accepted in Europe than in the U.S. and still is. I do believe that other things would go along with that, not all things being good either.

The biggest problem in raising awarness these days is people want to label you. I abhor sex trafficking, yet I participate in a sexual lifestyle as an escort. Too many people don't know where to draw the line between lust that is healthy, and that which leads to things like rape.

Many women do use their beauty to get what they want out of life. I don't think that's healthy, and it is always fading of course so you better have more than that. I use certain traits here to make money, but in the real world I feel more satisfied if I actually work hard rather than taking the short cuts.
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Old 09-07-2011, 04:54 AM   #4
NinaBrooke
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Hi London, hi Chloe!

Thanks so much, London... (but other than copy pasting other people`s intellectual property i have not done much so far in that post ...;-).....shame on me, it was just such a longwinded post anyhow, i thought i`d spare you til the discussion starts....)

BTW: It`s people like you guys that make it worth posting here, truly love it! I think we are a great community and i can`t wait to meet you either.
Chloe Kensington, congrats to your new identity, how wonderful! And also do agree with your and London`s thoughts on the erotic capital, i think you bring up a few great points!

I personally (not copypasted, i swear :-)......) think there is something like an erotic capital and we all use it. The question is on how far we go and if we enslave ourselves by doing so. Or “abuse” it. The critics the first wave feminists bring is more about the abuse of that capital then the claim it is n`t there and it can`t be used. I think its like someone said "the dosage makes the poison" or the way you use/abuse it. I personally admit that i am for example non of these women who "screw their way up the career ladder" and use every VIP i encounter to exploit for my personal Ego-Drama, but i am still one of these women who very much cares how i do look and how that look impresses people (also males of course).I do want to look pleasant as in "normatively seen as attractive" (probably to counteract my sharp tongue....lol) so i am with Maggie and Chloe on the review about the fact that men as well as women do have and use erotic capital.

Further, In the escort business it is pretty obvious this capital is used and intrigued and played with. Its a big part of the whole industry. Its starts with visuals especially nowadays in the internet industry. You use stereotypes to a certain extent, every escort or sexworker has certain erotic codes of conduct, erotic codes of dress, erotic codes of sexiness,erotic codes of how to proceed. That is pretty obvious when you compare the plain vanilla , saccharine
(thanks Chloe for bringing that word into my vocabulary)
world with the more kinky BDSM world. There ARE erotic codes and sexual capital is used. So its good to be aware of it. And not abuse it.

On the other hand, if its abused to favour men, then of course i also agree with the first wave feminists. But this was done before Hakim pointed it out as well, so no need to bash her for bringing up the obvious :-).
btw: She also talks about Males having erotic capital and using it. And i do think that is true as well. Nowadays even more than - lets say - in my grandfathers or even fathers age. We have the metrosexual men now that shape their bodies, use lotion, perfume and all these things. So, its even spreading towards all genders now instead of just female.
We also have hot males looking androgyneous and exploiting female erotic capital by dressing up as playmates. So its there. Its obvious. Unshaved legs and armpits aside :-)). ANd its not all about pleasing males.
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