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charlestudor2005 · 02-23-2010, 11:02 AM

Alright, I was much better and much more detailed about the sub thread, but thought there should be one for Mistresses/Masters (M/M), too.

But, since I don't live this viewpoint, it is hard for me to be very detailed about it. But I'm going to take a stab at it:

M/Ms, aside from obedience, what do you like in your subs? Is there particular play in which you are interested? If so, what is it? What would a sub have to have/do in order to be a good match for you?
Do you believe in topping from the bottom? If so, what kind of boundaries do you want the sub to delineate? If not, what kinds of protections do you offer the sub so play doesn't go too far too fast?
Most subs (including me) want to cum at some point. Is it OK with you that the sub cum? If so, under what conditions? If not, do you discuss that up front?
What are your favorite toys? What are your favorite kinds of sessions (i.e. pain, bondage, TPE)?

Feel free to add whatever you think needs to be said for this Thread.

otrdriver · 02-23-2010, 11:26 AM

CT good questions, this could be interesting!!

VeronicaMoore · 02-23-2010, 11:41 AM

1. Mental stability... first and foremost. I also like a sub who can *realistically* fake crying (lol). When I'm doing a roleplay scene, I really get into it. And when a sub fakes crying and it's bad acting, it just takes me out of the scenario. Hate it. I *prefer* for them to be as good of a role player as I am. Although, I had years of Dungeons and Dragons training under my belt before I started in The Lifestyle, so I can't expect that from everyone LMAO. I also like plenty of communication. Even when you're tied and gagged, you can still communicate LOL. I think communication is key.

2. In the civilian situations, I can't stand topping from the bottom. Before doing any BDSM play with a civilian, we've talked and discussed desires and limits at great length, so when a man starts topping from the bottom, it bores me.

In P4P situations, I can't expect that one wouldn't try this. Although you can try to get to know as much as you can about expectations and boundaries, it's almost impossible to cover everything without the session being completely scripted. So sometimes a little "nudge" in the right direction is is order. Now completely dictating the scene?? Yeah, I don't have any patience for that.

While I do like to push boundaries, I always make sure there's SOME kind of signal for when boundaries are getting *pushed* and one for when boundaries are *met.*

3. For the most part I don't care if they "take matters into their own hands" if they've been good and deserve it. Hey, I like it and it amuses me haha! Aside from that... well, it depends on the session and how good (or bad) he's been.

4. I think I have a bit of a sadistic side. So my faves (in order) are tease & denial, foot worship, spanking, verbal humiliation/abuse, pin/submission wrestling, trampling, CBT, and ra*e fantasy. I enjoy other things too (particularly certain fetishes: latex, stockings, giantess fetish, high heel shoe, smoking... even though I don't smoke, I think it's sexy; and sissy training), but those are my favorites. My favorite toys are the "Board of Education" (my favorite paddle), my clear ball vice, my interchangeable gag (it has a broom attachment, a dildo attachment, an ashtray attachment and a toilet brush attachment). Actually... that gag is my favorite toy EVER. OF ALL TIME. And has the most versatility. Damn, I love that thing!!

RickO'shayRabbitt · 02-27-2010, 09:27 AM

Charles, I gotta hand it to you. You are not timid about investigating this semi-taboo stuff. Frankly, I don't see how a sub could not top from the bottom a little bit (if I understand what that means.) I mean, the guy is paying for it so naturally he has a climax (pun intended) he wants to experience. Since the domme can't read all of his thoughts and desires, surely it is OK for the guy to do some nudging in certain directions himself? Yes?
As for the playing with himself if he has been a good boy--I have to say, I don't know if I could slip into subspace if I wasn't physically as well as mentally aroused. I am not in my 20s or 30s (or 40s) so it takes more than a wink, nod and stiff breeze to raise my flag pole.

VeronicaMoore · 02-27-2010, 11:20 AM

For some, there doesn't *need* to be any physical stimulation, even if they are paying.

And also there's really only so much about "climaxes," that many would like to discuss openly and directly on a public message board too. Sometimes you just have to read between the lines a little.

charlestudor2005 · 02-28-2010, 06:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by VeronicaMoore

And also there's really only so much about "climaxes," that many would like to discuss openly and directly on a public message board too. Sometimes you just have to read between the lines a little.

Maybe that's what the <PRIVATE> button is for.

VeronicaMoore · 02-28-2010, 08:32 AM

Hmm... I was unaware that providers could get premium access and could read private comments. Well whaddya know!

charlestudor2005 · 02-28-2010, 11:01 AM

VM, not what I meant. There is a button in the Reply dialogue boxes called "private." That's the button I meant. And I assume it appears on every posting dialogue box.

VeronicaMoore · 02-28-2010, 11:16 AM

No... it does not.

charlestudor2005 · 02-28-2010, 11:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by charlestudor2005

I assume it appears on every posting dialogue box.

Quote:

Originally Posted by VeronicaMoore

No... it does not.

Old saying, "To assume is to make an ass out of u and me." In this case, it was just me.

VeronicaMoore · 02-28-2010, 11:30 AM

Yeah... pretty much

ElisabethWhispers · 03-04-2010, 09:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by barneyrubble

Charles, I gotta hand it to you. You are not timid about investigating this semi-taboo stuff. Frankly, I don't see how a sub could not top from the bottom a little bit (if I understand what that means.) I mean, the guy is paying for it so naturally he has a climax (pun intended) he wants to experience. Since the domme can't read all of his thoughts and desires, surely it is OK for the guy to do some nudging in certain directions himself? Yes?
As for the playing with himself if he has been a good boy--I have to say, I don't know if I could slip into subspace if I wasn't physically as well as mentally aroused. I am not in my 20s or 30s (or 40s) so it takes more than a wink, nod and stiff breeze to raise my flag pole.

I detest topping from the bottom. That's when a gag needs to be used when an individual will just not be quiet. "Do this. Now do this. A little to the right. A little to the left. Ra. Ra. Ra." just gets on my last nerve.

Yes, I believe discussion is very important BEFORE the time that you begin. Then all bets are off. That is why you use safe words. All of the sub's limitations and desires should be discussed in advance and then the topping from the bottom is not necessary. Of course, this is in an ideal world and this "world" isn't often ideal.

So? We have to break the rules. Isn't this whole dom/sub thing tough? Regular sex is so much simpler.

As far as orgasm goes, my mentor was/is "Old Guard" and didn't mix the two. I, however, do. I don't understand having one without the other. Giving of oneself is a very sensual thing to do and very arousing for the dominate. Maybe not for all of them, but in my case? Oh yes.

Elisabeth

Dasani · 03-04-2010, 09:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by charlestudor2005

M/Ms, aside from obedience, what do you like in your subs? Is there particular play in which you are interested? If so, what is it? What would a sub have to have/do in order to be a good match for you?
Do you believe in topping from the bottom? If so, what kind of boundaries do you want the sub to delineate? If not, what kinds of protections do you offer the sub so play doesn't go too far too fast?
Most subs (including me) want to cum at some point. Is it OK with you that the sub cum? If so, under what conditions? If not, do you discuss that up front?
What are your favorite toys? What are your favorite kinds of sessions (i.e. pain, bondage, TPE)?

1. Consideration.... Open to most honestly and tend to enjoy them with great pleasure. A sub would have to totally submit to be a match for me. Some play with but don't total submit.

2. Topping from the bottom, depend on the day honestly and the sub.

3. Honestly some of my subs enjoy c*mming and yeah, I allow it, with certain ones (not all). The ones I do allow to c*m usually know that it will not happen through penatration (unless you know..lol).

4. Strap-ons, flask, gags & cameras. My favorite sessions are the ones where I take them out on a public humiliation tour. We go buy me toys with thier C.C. to use on them & others.

VeronicaMoore · 03-04-2010, 01:34 PM

Oooh... I forgot about public humiliation. That's definitely one of my favorites and a specialty of mine (just ask my ex lol)

My favorite sub flies me into Houston so I can humiliate him in public. Funny thing is he lives in Dallas, but he wants to be completely berated in a place where he's sure he won't run into anyone he knows.

toyrrific · 03-07-2010, 10:22 AM

I find it interesting that the only responses thus far are from Domme's, i.e., professional Dominatrices. From the Master side of this question, it is very simple.

1. Being properly affectionate after playtime is necessary. See 3 below for the remainder of this answer.
2. Topping from the bottom is not allowed. Proper conversation, trust and "safe" words should be established prior to the start of any play thus eliminating the need for TFTB. Additionally, the basic rule is that the Master is in control, but the sub is the controller.
3. Controlled orgasm - She is teased and tormented - brought to the edge over and over with hands, lips, fingers, toys, and everything else that I can think of. Inevitably an orgasm will be forthcoming, usually from prolonged flogging on her back and buttocks after she has been brought to the brink over and over. Once she has had multiple orgasms to the point of almost complete exhaustion, a cooling off period of being held in her favorite blanket ensues and then she is required to take care of Master's needs. I don't know about the Mistresses, but I do know that playtime excites Master to the point of extreme need. My submissives all know that a trip "around the world" will deliver a large quantity of cream to their throats.
4. BLINDFOLD. Depriving one's submissive of the sense of sight heightens all of the other senses dramatically. Floggers of all types, light thin rubber to exquisite leathers from various animals to heavy strands of braided hair (you have to see it to believe it).

We have a "pony tail" that is a lot of fun. My submissive has been spanked both in public and in semi-private environments where a t-back thong is the only thing covering her bottom and her nipple ringed top is completely exposed.