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Old 05-24-2011, 07:27 AM   #31
atlcomedy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SugarBeth View Post
I couldn't figure out if the mockery was directed at me or the guys. If it's at me, my point was, as someone mentioned previously, someone could say they're on eccie and name a name, but unless they go through the PM system, I'm less likely to believe they are who they say they are (or at least, they are that eccie member.)
I wasn't mocking you.

BTW, you seem real defensive ever since you cried wolf on a 411 no show then was told by Gina your situation wasn't really a no show...
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Old 05-24-2011, 07:38 AM   #32
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Naomi,

Totally understood! I am with you here. I dont agree with ladies who wont work together to keep one another safe. We need more of that for sure. But everyone works differently and I suppose we must accept it.

In reply to your scenario in the first paragraph, we must remember that people change. A client may be wonderful and perfect for one lady and the next one he sees- he may be a monster- so it wouldnt matter how in depth the first lady went to assure you he is a great guy- whether she provided one simple line or a novel matters not- Soooooo what is to be done? More screening. You have to tackle all your options and not settle for just references.


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Quote:
Originally Posted by Naomi4u View Post
So ladies that don't answer reference checks....

What if you saw a guy and he was a little pushy. Come two months later he decided to see a another lady. The night before their date she writes you asking you for a reference but you don't answer. Another lady answers her reference request with just "Yeah he's ok." and that's it. During the date he rapes the girl. Wouldn't you feel a bit guilty? I know I would.

There are soo many hobbyists out there and soo many ways to generate business. I wasn't afraid of losing one or even two clients. If a guy was a little pushy with me, I would tell the lady that asked for a reference check. If he tried to negotiate my rate during the date.. I would tell the lady that asked for a reference check. I don't understand why a lady wouldn't help keep help another lady out/ keep another lady safe. I just don't get that.

Honestly.. I would think she's just spiteful or maybe she's jealous and nothing more. I would never put a hobbyist before another lady when it comes to safety. Men are bigger and stronger than us and can cause a lot more harm than we can.
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Old 05-24-2011, 07:39 AM   #33
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Thanks KKA! Well said!
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Old 05-24-2011, 08:05 AM   #34
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Just because you don't see them screen doesn't mean they don't. There are methods of screening which are less obvious than others. It may be that the girl you contacted didn't screen, or it may simply be that you didn't see her do so. I doubt many customers notices me checking them for signs of medical issues, but that doesn't mean I'm not doing it. Half our business is subtlety, so why are men so surprised when we're subtle?
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Old 05-24-2011, 08:22 AM   #35
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The other problem ladies has with screening is other ladies telling you what you needed to know about the client. Yes, it goes back to the questions you asked the lady. One lady might not think he's rough but when you she the client, he is rough and trying to BB without saying anything, for the most experienced lady. Then you don't want to say anything because he was supposedly an experienced hobbyist with over 25 reviews. Yes, I know that most ladies would say OUT the hobbyist but does it really happen??
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Old 05-24-2011, 08:42 AM   #36
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Quote:
Originally Posted by IDMT View Post
SugarBeth, next time you decide to pass through OKC, please let me know. I'd love to be screened by you.

I'm even on P411.

You're cute, and I even like your avatar. You get extra bonus points.

Quote:
Originally Posted by atlcomedy View Post
I wasn't mocking you.

BTW, you seem real defensive ever since you cried wolf on a 411 no show then was told by Gina your situation wasn't really a no show...
I wasn't getting uppity about if you were mocking me or not. I just wanted to know if you were aiming it at me or not. And as far as I'm concerned, it was a nc/ns to me-- the guy had said let's meet tonight, asked me the time, and I told him. It may not have been a nc/ns to Gina, and that's fine since I wasn't out for the guy's blood anyway. However it was the first time I'd run into the problem, and I wanted to know the answer related to P411 users. I don't see how I've been real defensive, nor how asking what to do about a nc/ns for a P411 is calling wolf-- it's not like I outed the guy and became a screaming banshee. It was a hobbyist related question and I posted it here. Gina defines a nc/ns in a more definite way, and that's cool-- otherwise there'd be a lot more misunderstandings.

Now I'll know to make sure that step three is secured before setting aside time to meet with someone.

Quote:
Originally Posted by KlassyKelliAnn View Post
Naomi,

In reply to your scenario in the first paragraph, we must remember that people change. A client may be wonderful and perfect for one lady and the next one he sees- he may be a monster- so it wouldnt matter how in depth the first lady went to assure you he is a great guy- whether she provided one simple line or a novel matters not- Soooooo what is to be done? More screening. You have to tackle all your options and not settle for just references.


KKA
XOXOXO
Hmmm....I'll be thinking about this today and asking my girlfriends in the business their opinion. I think it's a very valid point. The only way I've seen another girl address this is to be a real stickler about the man needing three references in the last four months. She doesn't care if it's four months and one day-- if he doesn't have three references in the last four months, he's not seeing her. Could he still be a monster? sure. But hopefully the treatment of the three women was the normal pattern of behavior, and not "being good" til he got to the provider he wanted to be a monster to. Scary thought
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Old 05-24-2011, 11:55 AM   #37
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As a hobbyist I won't see a provider that doesn't screen. If they don't it makes me think either they see 20 guys a day or has something to do with LE. A real turn off in both cases,. lol
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Old 05-24-2011, 01:39 PM   #38
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Quote:
BTW, you seem real defensive ever since you cried wolf on a 411 no show then was told by Gina your situation wasn't really a no show...
Personally, I think she handled it beautifully (we all have different view points) and find the ol' "rub it in her face" tactic very distasteful. But that's just me.

Always,
Gina

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Old 05-24-2011, 01:49 PM   #39
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GinaXXX View Post
Personally, I think she handled it beautifully (we all have different view points) and find the ol' "rub it in her face" tactic very distasteful. But that's just me.

Always,
Gina

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Thank you! I agree.

KKA
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Old 05-24-2011, 02:55 PM   #40
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SugarBeth View Post
You're cute, and I even like your avatar. You get extra bonus points.
And you get bonus points for screening and being beautiful... I look forward to your next visit.
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Old 05-24-2011, 03:35 PM   #41
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Let me ask this, as this is my situation. There are very few ladies that stay in my area. 95%+ travel and I have only seen 2 or 3 that advertised on BP that are members here (only visited 1). Most of the ladies that come through do not screen. Do I not hobby because of this?
I tried to see one lady that was not on here but screened. I was new and had only seen 1 lady at the time. She asked for my work number and I gave it, my name, and my extension. Never heard back from her.
How does someone like me get the requirements ladies ask for? I also don't have the time to travel 2 hrs away to the closest big city where the ladies do screen.
I am asking this with all sincerity because I feel like I am stuck in a loop and really tired of getting crappy service.
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Old 05-24-2011, 03:49 PM   #42
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What's wrong with these providers who don't screen? Whatever...it's their lives.
I ran into a few men who didn't like to be screen. They sent me a one-liner email saying: "Are you available today?" (($&#*)&%)#*%&%&......this is my biggest pet peeve!!!!)
I emailed back saying "Hi there...I'm sorry...have we met before? Do I know you? If we haven't met, I dislike a one-liner email like that with no proper introduction or references). I asked him to send me a pm from Eccie, write one paragraph of introduction, age, phone number, ethnictiy, references, and to set up appt in the next few days since I need time to screen. He said "I'll go somewhere else."
I wrote back: "PERFECT!" :-)
It doesn't make any sense whatsoever! What would a man want to see a provider who doesn't screen???
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Old 05-24-2011, 06:25 PM   #43
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Quote:
Originally Posted by shorty View Post
Very interesting points SugarBeth. Rather I agree with your method or not, you feel comfortable in your screening process. Thats all the matters as long your through and don't endanger yourself or your date.

Do have a question though. What if the guy doesn't do reviews and doesn't have P411 or a board presence? He does have references but the ladies are hard to get ahold of verify him. Are you going to say NO to him because you didn't have an alternative way of verifing him?
I most certainly would say no. References from ladies that do not respond are just as good as no references at all. I give references to all of the gentleman I have seen, even if it's just a quick note. It's common courtesy.
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Old 05-24-2011, 07:30 PM   #44
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Quote:
Originally Posted by IDMT View Post
Even though a provider may be verified on ECCIE, I still find it quite disconcerting when a provider's sole method of screening is to ask me via text if I'm LE.

That's it. Nothing else.

Am I overreacting by backpedaling as fast as I can from her? If her screening is as flippant and haphazard as she makes it out to be then I can't help but wonder what else she is sloppy about (and not the good kind of sloppy).
Your not over reacting,,go with you gut feeling That's downright scary screening skills
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Old 05-24-2011, 07:33 PM   #45
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Quote:
Originally Posted by incognito isis View Post
I have used BP on occasion to advertise also. I see nothing wrong with it, as long as you screen. I have met some great clients off that site, believe it or not. But the majority of the emails you will get are from the biggest losers or freebie seekers. Theres nothing wrong with where you advertise, it's how you carry yourself and conduct business. BP has received such a bad reputation because the majority of the people there are scammers or LE lurkers.
Same here. Many people fail to understand that there is difference between backpage GIRL and backpage ADVERTISER.

Lina
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