correspondence

[boardman]

Originally Posted by Bonnie Castle

Some clients are more needy then others.

You called?

[dream-big]

Originally Posted by RoxyDDD

I would discuss it with them in a friendly manner and ask them to keep it to a minimum.

Originally Posted by FoxyNC

It's called "Establishing Boundaries"

Originally Posted by Bonnie Castle

... Just curious what everyone thought. And gn is not what I'm referring too. I mean the all day long texts that are every day.

I agree with RoxyDDD and FoxyNC; be friendly but assertive to establish your boundaries. Tell him you enjoy your time together and the friendly offline banter, but the excessive daily texts has become distracting when you're with other clients or "off the clock" with the family. I'd recommend doing it over a phone call instead of text so your tone isn't miscommunicated. You could wait until you see him next time, but that might be a pre-session mood killer that even viagra won't salvage…especially if he has a crush for you.

Personally, I need to have a mental connection (at some level) outside the playdate if I am to revisit my playmate (civi or provider alike). But that chemistry has to be there for both parties. Where the lady can open up and be herself a bit more, instead of always playing the naughty hottie role. Obviously not everyone has the maturity to handle that without blurring certain lines.

At the end of the day, everyone likes something a bit different, but it has to be within the comfort zone (i.e. boundaries) of the client and provider alike. While some guys will only see a girl if she provides DT, BBBJ and is completely NSA, I want a woman that welcomes a passionate DFK and an occasional friendly, but genuine, text to see how the other is doing…after all she shares a secret about me that no one else knows about (except for you ECCIE sex freaks). As we like to say in many of our online reviews…YMMV!

[cabletex7]

Respond by asking if you can "borrow" some money.

[dream-big]

Originally Posted by cabletex7

Respond by asking if you can "borrow" some money.

[38super]

Originally Posted by FoxyNC

NOT TRUE.


It's called "Establishing Boundaries"- want to know how I know?
I, too, have had that same problem before...
Yes, we can anticipate that this IS GOING TO HAPPEN due to the nature of this business, however, there are ways to prevent this from happening.
I also understand the whole "wanting to be nice & be professionally courteous"
HOWEVER, there comes a time, when these boundaries aren't respected, you have to take action. The only reason some guys do this is because you have FAILED to "train them" (TELL THEM) what the boundaries ARE.
(You can't expect a dog to not pee on the floor if he is not trained, right?)

I googled a bit & found this article. (It's a Psychology type article... the inner thought process to go about doing this; setting boundaries.)

http://psychcentral.com/lib/10-way-t...er-boundaries/

But if you DO NOTHING, don't expect the men to just "automatically KNOW" what they are doing wrong. No One is a mind reader, although, some of these guys have been around the block- there are your noobs and the guys who are just totally socially inept...
Hinting doe NOT work.


And if setting boundaries doesn't work...

Try this app; MrNumber (link below)
It can block texts, phone numbers, restricted calls, has a "spam report" service online, that will pop up if reported telemarketers are trying to call, & more.
(And it's FREE for android.)
If you have an Iphone, there is a similar app, although I couldn't tell you the name off the top of my head.

Good luck!


(MrNumber App link on Playstore)
https://play.google.com/store/apps/d....blocker&hl=en

Idk...once you've sucked his dick, licked his ass, fucked him, he ate you out and licked your ass all within 15 minutes of meeting him for the first time, the word "boundaries" is pretty much out the window. I guess all i can say is if it bothers u that much get a hobby phone and dont take it with u when ur doing RL stuff and dont give out ur personal # anymore

[Guest030816]

Originally Posted by FoxyNC

The only reason some guys do this is because you have FAILED to "train them" (TELL THEM) what the boundaries ARE.
(You can't expect a dog to not pee on the floor if he is not trained, right?)

Good luck!

It's nice to see how you think of your clients as pets who need to be "trained". I reckon ya'll have a different type of clientele up there in SC. I understand your point on boundaries, I don't however appreciate your attitude about being trained like your labradoodle, to come and fetch at your convenience. This is how you pay your bills, correct? Many times my job is inconvenient as well, but I deal with it until I move on to a better job. That mentality may work on the fucktards in SC, good luck bringing that to Texas.

Bonnie,
Excuse my rant. But perhaps you underestimate your IOP and created an iillusion of something more than just a business arrangement. Maybe this guy views you as a friend as well as an escort. Granted I don't have friends I text all day everyday, maybe he's approaching stalker status. Either way, you should gently tell him that you don't have time to answer all his texts, that he needs to minimize his casual conversations.

[dream-big]

Originally Posted by 38super

Idk...once you've sucked his dick, licked his ass, fucked him, he ate you out and licked your ass all within 15 minutes of meeting him for the first time, the word "boundaries" is pretty much out the window.

Boundaries should still exist. While new to ECCIE and this so-called hobby, I've been a swinger off/on since I was 22 years old. I had amazing times behind closed doors, but equally enjoyed making friends away from the bedroom…but even then, there were boundaries which everyone respected. Proper social norms don't become obsolete because 2x (or more) people have sex…but, like I mentioned in my previous post, a lot has to do with emotional maturity.

[dream-big]

Originally Posted by H.Hardhat

That mentality may work on the fucktards in SC, good luck bringing that to Texas.

Play nice HH…the girl hasn't even packed up and moved yet. She was just trying to draw an innocent and simple parallel to prove her point about behavior modification.

[black sunshine]

Originally Posted by Bonnie Castle

My phone has no block feature for texts.

Lol! The financial part is not a bad thing. Just curious what everyone thought.

And gn is not what I'm referring too.

I mean the all day long texts that are every day.

There are free apps to block for both android and iPhone. Messages and calls go straight to a spam like folder, you still have them but they don't show up anywhere on your phone except that folder. You don't get any notification.

[FoxyNC]

Originally Posted by H.Hardhat

It's nice to see how you think of your clients as pets who need to be "trained". I reckon ya'll have a different type of clientele up there in SC. I understand your point on boundaries, I don't however appreciate your attitude about being trained like your labradoodle, to come and fetch at your convenience. This is how you pay your bills, correct? Many times my job is inconvenient as well, but I deal with it until I move on to a better job. That mentality may work on the fucktards in SC, good luck bringing that to Texas.

(In a deep southern drawl: )
Why yes, every gentleman needs "groomed."


Heh, see what I did there?
What? You're NOT laughing?
I'm getting licked by a guy with a dog avatar who can't take a man-canine anology....

I'm headed to dictionary.com to see if this scenario is listed somewhere under "irony."

Originally Posted by dream-big

Play nice HH…the girl hasn't even packed up and moved yet. She was just trying to draw an innocent and simple parallel to prove her point about behavior modification.

Exactly.
And thankyou.
Watch out, the palaverers will be screaming white-knight before you know it!

[black sunshine]

He needs his nose rubbed in it and told he's a bad boy.

[Guest030816]

What you are missing is the difference between a lap dog, and an Alpha Dog. I get the analogy, but looking under it at your perception that clients need to be trained like your pets. Just a bit of a turn off.

db, that is playing nice considering the territory. This is not the first time foxy and I have differed on issues. I've never tried to be offensive, and apologize of it was taken wrong. The long winded one and I will differ again I'm sure, but that just how we play.

Carry on...

[FoxyNC]

Originally Posted by H.Hardhat

What you are missing is the difference between a lap dog, and an Alpha Dog. I get the analogy, but looking under it at your perception that clients need to be trained like your pets. Just a bit of a turn off.

db, that is playing nice considering the territory. This is not the first time foxy and I have differed on issues. I've never tried to be offensive, and apologize of it was taken wrong. The long winded one and I will differ again I'm sure, but that just how we play.

Carry on...

If it makes you feel any better (or to clarify) ALL humans need trained.
We all have to establish boundaries with each other, do we not?
It was really a metaphor. If it was in poor taste, my apologies, but I thought of training an employee (a human), but the differences (money aspects) too much so as to compare it in that situation usefully- so the next "training" I thought of ... yes, was dogs.

But Sir, I stand by my conviction- EVEN ALPHA dogs, ESPECIALLY ALPHAS must be trained.
All NEWBIES must be trained similarly.


Sorry, if it offends you.
I'll remind you Sir, not to shit on my carpet either.

[Frog Done]

Originally Posted by dream-big

I agree with RoxyDDD and FoxyNC; be friendly but assertive to establish your boundaries. Tell him you enjoy your time together and the friendly offline banter, but the excessive daily texts has become distracting when you're with other clients or "off the clock" with the family. I'd recommend doing it over a phone call instead of text so your tone isn't miscommunicated. You could wait until you see him next time, but that might be a pre-session mood killer that even viagra won't salvage…especially if he has a crush for you.

Personally, I need to have a mental connection (at some level) outside the playdate if I am to revisit my playmate (civi or provider alike). But that chemistry has to be there for both parties. Where the lady can open up and be herself a bit more, instead of always playing the naughty hottie role. Obviously not everyone has the maturity to handle that without blurring certain lines.

At the end of the day, everyone likes something a bit different, but it has to be within the comfort zone (i.e. boundaries) of the client and provider alike. While some guys will only see a girl if she provides DT, BBBJ and is completely NSA, I want a woman that welcomes a passionate DFK and an occasional friendly, but genuine, text to see how the other is doing…after all she shares a secret about me that no one else knows about (except for you ECCIE sex freaks). As we like to say in many of our online reviews…YMMV!

I agree completely, and as with all things in life it takes open communication both here and in the RW.

FoxyNC I think your right in 'Training' your clients as to your boundaries as it is different for different people and like you said we are not mind reader.

[D.G.]

Some cant be trained and should just be put down .