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		|  08-23-2012, 09:38 PM | #1 |  
	| ☆Fictional Character☆ 
				 
                User ID: 29515 Join Date: Jun 3, 2010 Location: Here and there 
					Posts: 5,212
				My ECCIE Reviews      | 
				 Giving References....Gents Please Read 
 
			
			I ALWAYS give references as soon as I see  that I got a PM, IM, or Email for them. I am very good about it and do  my very best to give as many details as possible so that the other Lady  feels safe and is informed (He likes this____he doesn't like when_____he  likes a shower as soon as he shows up, he had a glass of red wine with  me, he was ticklish...) so that their date goes as well as possible and  both parties enjoy themselves.Lately I have been getting reference  requests from Gents that I haven't see in 8 months-2 years. I understand  that some Gents don't hobby as much as others but that is a long time.
 My  new policy is not to give a reference if I haven't seen someone in more  than 8 months. 8 months is a long time, I can't remember as many  details at that point and I don't know first hand if someone is still an  ideal Gent. All of us Ladies know that a lot can change in weeks let  alone months. For all I know he could have turned into a complete jerk  that rips girls off and I would be blindly giving other Ladies the okay  to spend time with him because he was great with me a year and a half ago. I can't risk doing that to another Lady.
 Today  was the last reference that I will give out from longer than 8 months  ago. Hell, I was perfectly clear with that Lady that I haven't seen him  in almost 2 years. I explained that he made a date with me months after  he saw me and canceled then showed interest on a trip months after that  but never set anything up and then I had a family emergency emerge when  he last showed interest in possibly making a date with me but he didn't  set anything up and I had to cancel my trip anyway. I explained that  when I saw him he was safe and sweet and that was all I remembered after  so long. I feel like a jerk that I didn't have more information for her  and it made me feel like I was a somewhat unreliable reference which  makes me feel crappy because I want to help as much as possible.
 Sorry Gents, but, I feel  that my new policy is best for us Ladies and that it isn't unreasonable.
 
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		|  08-23-2012, 09:52 PM | #2 |  
	| Valued Poster 
				 
                
				Join Date: Dec 10, 2011 Location: Rochester 
					Posts: 5,587
				      | 
 
			
			I can't remember what I did a week ago let alone 8 months LOL.  Love the new avatar
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		|  08-24-2012, 04:21 AM | #3 |  
	| Valued Poster 
				 
                
				Join Date: Mar 8, 2011 Location: the alerts section saving Karen 
					Posts: 18,950
				      | 
 
			
			Not a problem
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		|  08-24-2012, 07:56 AM | #4 |  
	| ☆Fictional Character☆ 
				 
                User ID: 29515 Join Date: Jun 3, 2010 Location: Here and there 
					Posts: 5,212
				My ECCIE Reviews      | 
 
			
			I'm so happy this is going in a positive direction, I was on edge that it could go horribly wrong haha. Thank you for your posts Gents.
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		|  08-24-2012, 08:00 AM | #5 |  
	| Account Disabled 
				 
                
				Join Date: Dec 20, 2010 Location: Not Here 
					Posts: 1,570
				      | 
 
			
			Nope!! I do believe most of us would understand. I dont know how you would remember who is who after 8 months anyways. Think this should be a good standard for all providers to go by.
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		|  08-24-2012, 08:48 AM | #6 |  
	| Valued Poster 
				 
                
				Join Date: May 30, 2011 Location: North of Albany, NY 
					Posts: 120
				      | 
 
			
			I have no problem with that policy.  I think most guys wouldn't even ask if it has been so long, unless you were his only possible reference.
 
 My only real problem is that my name isn't laying on that sweet rack!
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		|  08-24-2012, 09:20 AM | #7 |  
	| ☆Fictional Character☆ 
				 
                User ID: 29515 Join Date: Jun 3, 2010 Location: Here and there 
					Posts: 5,212
				My ECCIE Reviews      | 
 
			
			
	Quote: 
	
		| 
					Originally Posted by bigkid69  I have no problem with that policy.  I think most guys wouldn't even ask if it has been so long, unless you were his only possible reference.
 
 My only real problem is that my name isn't laying on that sweet rack!
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*Blushing*
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		|  08-24-2012, 10:03 AM | #8 |  
	| Account Disabled 
				 
                
				Join Date: Mar 3, 2012 Location: In the background 
					Posts: 141
				      | 
				  
 
			
			
	Quote: 
	
		| 
					Originally Posted by Lexxxy  My new policy is not to give a reference if I haven't seen someone in more than 8 months. 8 months is a long time, I can't remember as many details at that point and I don't know first hand if someone is still an ideal Gent. All of us Ladies know that a lot can change in weeks let alone months. For all I know he could have turned into a complete jerk that rips girls off and I would be blindly giving other Ladies the okay to spend time with him because he was great with me a year and a half ago. I can't risk doing that to another Lady. |  
That is the only part of the discussion that I don't think is terribly valid when ladies say that they time limit their references -- saying that the guy may have become a psychopath in the interim. That is , of course , true, but if a guy's attitude changes , it could happen the day after his visit as easy as a year after. There really is no sure thing to use as a time period.
  
That being said, the policy is very fair -- especially if you are giving well thought out references like that. Some ladies just say yes or no. Others give more detail like what you do. No way should a guy expect you to remember all that detail on everyone you meet for longer than 6-8 months. Sure, some ladies go longer at their discretion -- especially with a long time client who developed a solid rep, but 8 months seems very fair as a general rule.
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		|  08-24-2012, 11:11 AM | #9 |  
	| BANNED 
				 
                
				Join Date: Jan 8, 2010 Location: South 
					Posts: 6,667
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	Quote: 
	
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					Originally Posted by bigkid69  My only real problem is that my name isn't laying on that sweet rack!
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Damn!  Just noticed it myself a few minutes ago.  I am sooooo clueless sometimes....
 
Did I already miss my "turn"?       |  
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		|  08-24-2012, 12:06 PM | #10 |  
	| Valued Poster 
				 
                
				Join Date: Dec 12, 2009 Location: near Lake Ontario 
					Posts: 49,923
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			when getting a reference where I may be the topic. please remember that
 
 He's a fucking asshole
 
 may be true from some. from a few it may be a term of endearment.
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		|  08-24-2012, 05:26 PM | #11 |  
	| ☆Fictional Character☆ 
				 
                User ID: 29515 Join Date: Jun 3, 2010 Location: Here and there 
					Posts: 5,212
				My ECCIE Reviews      | 
 
			
			Tonight I just got one from years ago from someone I have no recollection of seeing at all. I feel bad that I am the only well known provider he has ever seen so I'm the only reference this girl will take and I dont remember him.  
Sorry    |  
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		|  08-24-2012, 06:52 PM | #12 |  
	| Premium Access 
				 
                
				Join Date: Dec 17, 2009 Location: behind you 
					Posts: 8,583
				      | 
 
			
			Lexxxy, can I use you as a reference? We saw each other .............. oppp's I'll have to fix that. In the meantime, can  I have a pre-reference? LOL
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		|  08-24-2012, 07:31 PM | #13 |  
	| El Hombre de la Mancha 
				 
                
				Join Date: Dec 30, 2009 Location: State of Confusion 
					Posts: 46,452
				      | 
 
			
			Lexxxy you have never met me or seen me, I thinck that is an advantage over GP, can a guy get a reference?
 I can even help with the content of information you can pass on:
 
 dork
 asshat
 fucktard
 no skills.
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		|  08-24-2012, 09:42 PM | #14 |  
	| Valued Poster 
				 
                
				Join Date: Mar 8, 2011 Location: the alerts section saving Karen 
					Posts: 18,950
				      | 
 
			
			lazy
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		|  08-24-2012, 10:06 PM | #15 |  
	| Valued Poster 
				 
                
				Join Date: Aug 4, 2011 Location: Dreamland 
					Posts: 289
				      | 
 
			
			Lex, I think you're being more than generous with 8 months. Even 6 should be adequate.
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