Has anyone unknowingly dated a provider?

[ralphmalph]

Way back in the day, when I was young and dumb and fresh out of college, I hit it off with the hot receptionist at my first real job (this was over ten years ago and I haven't talked to her in quite a while). We had both gone to private Dallas high schools and had too much fun in college, so we had that in common, but she was a few years younger than me.

Anyhow, we hung out and had good times, but I was ridiculously naive and focussed on my piddly job. Things moved at an odd pace, even for me - some nights frisky, some nights cold, other times completely out of touch. I never knew what to expect, and I had no idea why.

Over the course of our 8 months together, I finally figured out that she was a provider - and I didn't know what to think... Let's just say it wasn't a dream come true. It made me reconsider all my preconceived notions about every girl I met for a long time. It also drew me into the hobby, to a certain degree.

So now I'm fascinated by providers' stories - how they got into the biz, etc...

At this point I guess I'm rambling, but I'm curious to know if anyone's been in the same boat. And I wonder if any providers have been here and done this.

[ElisabethWhispers]

http://www.myfirstprofessionalsex.com/

Nice site with different stories of the why and hows we got into our line of work. Participating on this site has been on my "to do" list for a very long time.

You'll probably enjoy it!

Elisabeth

[MaxiMilyen]

I've never unknowingly dated a provider. LOL I have, however, knowingly participated in doubles with them....'-)

Seriously though.....the first time, ten + years ago....for the money. Second time....personal decision not to give my all to the heartless corporate world any longer and support myself doing what I love.....entertaining gentleman.

[Lauren Lane]

I have a guy friend who is unknowingly dating a provider.

[bipolar_cboy]

I can offer a couple variations on the general theme.

I am knowingly dating a provider. I once was the most straight arrow guy you could imagine (one woman man wanting a one man woman, loyal to a level of absurdity etc) and saw dating as a step in a progression - always got more serious or start over elsewhere. I am no longer into serious about much of anything so that makes dating possible. She wanted to stop the money and go to a conventional dating experience -says she is retired but dancing to make ends meet. Who knows. We can talk, we have good sex, we have fun and laugh, I was flattered (she is entirely out of my league) - so the answer was "sure". No regrets.

A work in progress but honestly a limited future here - I no longer have anything to offer a woman, so no point in talking the relative merits of her life decisions. Still, I don't see how either of us would be able to forget how all this started. As long as we are just having fun...it doesn't matter.

In a similar vein, i see a different provider that just got married and her husband clearly doesn't know. She totally loves this guy - BELIEVE IT - but likes her lifestyle too. Life is just too bizarre isn't it? we hang out...go to dinner...text and yak...and then pay to play. She wants to hear about my life...tell me about hers....her sisters her brothers her wedding. We never spend less than four hours together. She is soooo delightful. Beautiful, funny, sooo girl next door, a mind blower in bed. Honestly i forget she is a provider (She reminds me though). This is a true courtesan, she gives a complete life illusion - she makes me imagine myself handsome and charming. SHE IS A TRUE ARTIST. I always wanted to die at 90 at the hands of a jealous husband. My problem is i have a ways to go to 90 so it is all a bit unnerving.

As i write this i realize i need to stop seeing them both. This can't go somewhere good. I am gonna opt out of the bizarre and just start seeing providers that are willing to fuck me in half and kick my ass out the door. all this dating stuff fucks my mind up.

As to unknowingly ...as the above tale shows, you don't know what you don't know.. so who can say. I seriously doubt it happened to me...dating a provider (or for that matter a user) would be/is a Kafka-esque situation. I wonder how much of that honestly goes on. Honestly these ladies have to be sick out their ass of men - why would they wanna date any of us? In their shoes - with my mental makeup - i would slip from provider to axe murderer at some point. They could make a slasher movie about me. I like to think they would cast Scarlett Johannson in the part of me.

God i can really blather on can't I? Consider it therapy for me. My bottom line...the provider world is a veiled world. Most of what happens is largely unknown or an illusion. Put the money in and pull the lever.

[bipolar_cboy]

I can offer a couple variations on the general theme.

I am knowingly dating a provider. I once was the most straight arrow guy you could imagine (one woman man wanting a one man woman, loyal to a level of absurdity etc) and saw dating as a step in a progression - always got more serious or start over elsewhere. I am no longer into serious about much of anything so that makes dating possible. She wanted to stop the money and go to a conventional dating experience -says she is retired but dancing to make ends meet. Who knows. We can talk, we have good sex, we have fun and laugh, I was flattered (she is entirely out of my league) - so the answer was "sure". No regrets.

A work in progress but honestly a limited future here - I no longer have anything to offer a woman, so no point in talking the relative merits of her life decisions. Still, I don't see how either of us would be able to forget how all this started. As long as we are just having fun...it doesn't matter.

In a similar vein, i see a different provider that just got married and her husband clearly doesn't know. She totally loves this guy - BELIEVE IT - but likes her lifestyle too. Life is just too bizarre isn't it? we hang out...go to dinner...text and yak...and then pay to play. She wants to hear about my life...tell me about hers....her sisters her brothers her wedding. We never spend less than four hours together. She is soooo delightful. Beautiful, funny, sooo girl next door, a mind blower in bed. Honestly i forget she is a provider (She reminds me though). This is a true courtesan, she gives a complete life illusion - she makes me imagine myself handsome and charming. SHE IS A TRUE ARTIST. I always wanted to die at 90 at the hands of a jealous husband. My problem is i have a ways to go to 90 so it is all a bit unnerving.

As i write this i realize i need to stop seeing them both. This can't go somewhere good. I am gonna opt out of the bizarre and just start seeing providers that are willing to fuck me in half and kick my ass out the door. all this dating stuff fucks my mind up.

As to unknowingly ...as the above tale shows, you don't know what you don't know.. so who can say. I seriously doubt it happened to me...dating a provider (or for that matter a user) would be/is a Kafka-esque situation. I wonder how much of that honestly goes on. Honestly these ladies have to be sick out their ass of men - why would they wanna date any of us? In their shoes - with my mental makeup - i would slip from provider to axe murderer at some point. They could make a slasher movie about me. I like to think they would cast Scarlett Johannson in the part of me.

God i can really blather on can't I? Consider it therapy for me. My bottom line...the provider world is a veiled world. Most of what happens is largely unknown or an illusion. Put the money in and pull the lever.

[txcwby6]

Nope, just a stripper or two.

[cxu387]

Years ago I unknowingly dated a provider and the experience was very similar to yours. I was naive, the pace of things was odd, and it took me a while to figure out things.

Recently, I knowingly dated a provider and having matured and become aware of the hobby, I thought perhaps things could work. But, once again the pace of things was just incredibly odd and my knowing or trying to be understanding didn't help one bit.

I like how bipolar_cboy put it, the "provider world is a veiled world" and believe that whether you know or don't know, the outcome of dating a provider is going to be the same. You're much better off just "keeping things professional".

[scuba-jimmy]

Originally Posted by Lauren Lane

I have a guy friend who is unknowingly dating a provider.

Nice Lauren. Nice.

[Guest071613-2]

Originally Posted by cxu387

.... the "provider world is a veiled world" and believe that whether you know or don't know, the outcome of dating a provider is going to be the same. You're much better off just "keeping things professional".

I just have to ask....why is it that no one ever talks about how the hobbyist world is a veiled world, or how the outcome of dating a hobbyist is always the same?! Just wondering why it's a disaster to date a provider instead of a disaster to date a hobbyist. It's a disaster all the way around, but in my experience, and I have lots in this area, you guys can fuck up a good thing just as easily as a provider can.

I do agree that things should just be kept professional/friendly. Nothing wrong with being friends! But I would never date/get seriously involved with anyone who had paid me for my time, ever again.

The guys I date in my RL have no idea, and if they found out, I'd never see them again and move on with a quickness. Period.

[ChristinaofDallas]

The guy I am now dating knows- because I told him. He is fine with it, so long as I dont spill details of my dates when we are together. He doesnt ask why, or if I will quit. I credit that to the notion that maybe just maybe, he is that open-minded and secure. Hmmmm.....

[Guest122711]

"I'd venture to say that it's way easier for a provider to leave the hobby than it is for a hobbyist to quit screwing everything he sees, having been there, done that. Just sayin'."

I think if both provider and hobbiest found love together it's not that hard for either to walk away. Just I also think being in love is much more rare than most think. Most of the time I see relationships where one person really loves his or her partner and the other is just going a long for whatever reason. Hobbiest/provider isn't any different than any other relationship. It takes two to make it work and from my perspective that's pretty long odds regardless of professions or interests.

[Lauren Lane]

Originally Posted by scuba-jimmy

Nice Lauren. Nice.

Umm, am I supposed to tell him? That would be breaking the cardinal "outing" rule.

[80's Rocker]

Well to be honest...it's all cool to me...
1..If ur dateing a full GFE....No training involved +1
2..No worries,If ur hot babe is cheating on you..You know the answer..+2
3..You get to play with for free,,What other's have to Pay for..+3

I am different i guess...lol...I have dated a few ladies.Who may have hidden past's..But who doesn't ?
I dont care what you did yesterday or before you came home...
Your with me now..All that matter's...
Just my opinion..not that it matter's...lol

Rocker

[Texas Contrarian]

Yeah, 35 years ago.

I thought it was a pretty good story:

http://www.eccie.net/showthread.php?t=14398

(Scroll to post #16 on the second page.)