Safety, Security, and Privacy in the Hobby

[ztonk]

With a new year upon us, I thought it would be good to repost a slightly updated version of a post I made here back in 2011.

Security, safety, and privacy are three important pillars in this little hobby world of ours. It's up to each of us, on both sides of the transaction, to ensure that our playground stays safe and fun for everybody.

Periodically, we hear of incidents where someone's safety, security, or privacy has been compromised:

• A lady has to leave the hobby because a client becomes infatuated with her, showing up at her incall unannounced, or posting negative reviews and comments, or even outing her to friends/family/coworkers
• A lady has to announce a hasty retirement because a client's wife or significant other discovers incriminating evidence on a phone or when viewing a web browser's history or as a result of a little GPS snooping, and starts harassing her over the phone, or at home, or at her place of regular employment
• A lady becomes infatuated with one of her clients, showing up at his house or place of employment unannounced, or bad mouthing him to other providers, or calling and texting at inappropriate times and in inappropriate ways (the dreaded "pussy picture text"), or threatening to out him to his wife/family/coworkers/friends

With these incidents (and others) in mind, I'd like to provide some tips for both ladies and guys:

1. Always use a hobby phone and a hobby email account. (The ability to clear your call history or texts is not sufficient. If things go south with your spouse, the first thing his/her attorney is going to do is request your cell phone records... and you are toast.)
2. Only use your own computer/tablet/phone to access ECCIE, P411, and your hobby email account. Be sure to clear the web history or use the "private browsing" features in your web browser as a secondary safety step. Using a friend's wifi hot spot can be problematic if they are technically savvy as modern routers can be easily configured to log web traffic. Using a shared/family computer/tablet/phone, no matter how careful you think you are, could get you into hot water. You only have to slip up once.
3. Never use your hobby phone or hobby email account for anything non-hobby related. All the social media sites (Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Snapchat, Pinterest, Tumblr) do a scarily good job of matching your information. You don't want to show up as a friend suggestion on someone else's social media account (and vice versa!)
4. Never park your car where a hobbyist or provider (or her pimp or "friend" or "booker") can get your license plate number. In Texas it's ridiculously easy to get personal information from your tag.
5. Don't disclose personal information about yourself. Over time, another person can glean a lot of information about you from all those little snippets you gave and Google is not your friend.

Many years ago, Dagny (a former well-known A-list provider here) posted a thread entitled "Ten Things Every Provider Should Know About Their Clientele". For the purposes of this discussion, I want to cite 4 of them:

1. That seeing you is often times the highlight and/or Culmination of their day, week, or possibly even month.
3. That once in session, your words spoken carry far more weight and have a much larger impact than you might imagine.
5. That you often times fill a void in someone’s life which stretches far beyond that of both the physical realm and the relatively short time period the two of you spend together in a session.
6. Real or imagined, expressed or not – you DO matter and DO make a difference to so many.

Reading those four in this context, it is easy to see how what is spoken and done during a session can be misinterpreted, especially if one of you becomes smitten with the other. Sex, even when it is pay-for-play is an incredibly emotional and satisfying experience. In that afterglow of orgasm, it's way too easy to read things into words and conversations, and to make bad assumptions and come to wrong conclusions.

Play safe!

z

[Jennatx]

Thanks Ztonk well said
Happy New Year

[playingnthedark]

Thanks Z

[Parsifal]

Very good advice and good to read, even for us “seasoned” veterans. Hobby smartly, hobby safely and have respect for everyone’s right to privacy, especially your own.

By all means, enjoy fully the company of those you chose to see in the hobby. Just keep in mind that she (the provider) has a life in the RW that she is as entitled to as you are to yours...use the Golden rule.

[FirePhoenix]

forbidden topic

[FirePhoenix]

staff edit
#stop

[FirePhoenix]

I also feel that Ztonk should resign his volunteer status for his on going knowledge about the abusive stalking that has/is being done to me. For non-stop showing favoritism and prosecution of eccie members. Basically as a MOD you are suppose to show none these behaviors and to be impartial. Ztonk has a long track of not being impartial. Oh, and can you please clarify if Erin was or wasn't paid to attend one of your parties?

[FirePhoenix]

forbidden topic

[FirePhoenix]

Oh,and BTW Ztonk I've posted a warning for you on my Facebook page. I think that I've posted enough links that I'm sure you can find your way there. Oh,wait my bad I already sent you an email. Didn't anyone ever tell you that I don't get pissed off. I simply get creative.

[FirePhoenix]

Along with the stalking. How long would you be able to take this? Oh,after I have sent the Instagram video ,with the 3rd auto parts shop guy telling me that there's nothing wrong with my rear taillight ,my mechanic asked me if i thought that he was lieing to me.I told him that I had just proved that he did lied to me and to keep the money that I have been giving him to repair my van. My transmission is about gone in first gear.

[Whispers]

Enjoy the vacation that posting private messages is going to get you.

and damn woman..... You are a living poster for jacked up teeth....

If anyone EVER needed a vacation from this place you've proven yourself the neediest

[FirePhoenix]

So what did the 90 year old man have to say? That he can sale something? Mmm,I thought the selling snake-oil cure all days were over. Hasn't someone been able to fix his hearing aids to let him know that nobody buys from a charlatan anymore.

[FirePhoenix]

Slow clap,folks I have received an infraction for drum roll please...."disrespect towards a MOD". How did I disrespect a MOD? Folks you tell me. Then ask yourselves is this what you want for a MOD? Is disrespecting a MOD really what I did? Is there even a rule against standing up and saying the truth? What is the definition of- favoritism. What is the definition of- prosecution.
#truth #bullshit #whatajoke

[Whispers]

No kinder act has ever been done on this site than putting her out of her misery

Now....

How long till she shows up under one of her mandles?

[darkwader]

I'm scairt to hobby anymore